The Psychology of Cults
Carmen Macri
October 1, 2025
Words by Carmen Macri
Most of what we think we know about cults comes straight from Netflix binges and Hollywood thrillers, and it’s easy to take that at face value without ever digging into the reality. The truth is, cult psychology runs a lot deeper — and a lot stranger — than the stereotypes. Some of the sharpest, most capable people end up getting pulled in. And a cult doesn’t always look like robed figures on a mountaintop screaming about the end of days. Sometimes it’s subtler. Sometimes it’s in your school, your office or even your neighbor’s backyard.
For Ashlen Hilliard, growing up in Utah, where culture, religion and history collide, is what sparked an early fascination with belief and influence. That curiosity eventually pulled her back after college, where she took on the tough job of helping people leave Mormon Fundamentalist polygamous communities across the West. The work was intense, sometimes dangerous, but it forged her into a fierce advocate for survivors.
In 2022, Hilliard launched People Leave Cults, a resource hub for survivors and the loved ones trying to help them. As one of the few Cult Intervention Specialists in the country, she works with a team of experts to design personalized strategies for families dealing with everything from cults and gangs to trafficking, domestic violence and violent extremism.
Her path here is backed by serious credentials. Hilliard earned her MSc in the Psychology of Coercive Control, and her published research, “Understanding Reproductive Coercion in Cults and Destructive Group Settings,” broke ground as the first exploratory study of its kind. Before founding People Leave Cults, she also served as director of events for the International Cultic Studies Association (ICSA), where she organized workshops, conferences and support programs for people affected by cults and psychological manipulation.
And now, she is bringing her studies to the stage for a live show where she takes audiences deep inside the world of cults — how they start, why people get pulled in and what it really takes to break free. From notorious groups like Jonestown, Heaven’s Gate, and NXIVM to lesser-known but just as dangerous organizations, she unpacks the psychology, the manipulation and the subtle tactics cults use to keep control.
We had the opportunity to sit down with Hilliard before her show at the Florida Theatre on Oct. 8 to get an exclusive look at what to expect during her show.
Carmen: What inspired you to turn your work into a live show?
Hilliard: Oh, I love that question. Thank you for asking that. I, you know, I’ve been working with cult survivors now for seven years, and next year will be my eighth year working with survivors of high-control and cultic groups. And what I have found is that one of the most important aspects of prevention that can help keep people from falling into these systems is education. And it’s something that I do with people who’ve left cults who are like, “I can’t believe I got into this thing, and I want to better understand what happened to me.” And I think similarly, people want to know how to protect themselves. We have really great documentaries that are out about cults and survivor stories, and how all this can look. But I think there’s still a large percentage of people who think this could never happen to them. And I really wanted to show people how this can, in fact, happen to anyone. People aren’t immune, and I want to equip them with tools and knowledge and understanding about the psychology of cults, so that people can better protect themselves and also learn how to help survivors who’ve been in groups.
Carmen: I am so invested [in your work], it has always been a huge interest of mine. You mentioned you’ve worked closely with survivors. So what do you think is the most misunderstood aspect of cult involvement?
Hilliard: I think people can see a group on TV or see what leads someone into a cult, and I think, unfortunately, there’s this misconception of, like, only stupid people end up in these groups, that they were just gullible. But cults actually recruit the best and the brightest among us, because if you think about it, not everyone can hang with the demands of being in a high-control system. The amount it takes out of you. And intelligent people are really good at playing with ideas. You know, we all have a set of understanding fundamental assumptions about how the world works, and some people never really want to go beyond their fundamental assumptions to deviate from that. But people who are really intelligent like to sort of play with ideas and sort of think about what a new religious group has to offer the world. And so I think it’s important for people to realize you are not dumb or stupid if you end up in a cult. They recruit the best and the brightest.
Carmen: That is so interesting. I guess I’ve kind of always thought very similarly to that, because I know I’ve watched hundreds of documentaries, and I know that a lot of people just join it because they’re like, “Oh, I just want to see what it’s like.” And then they get so wrapped up in this world, enveloped in it, so they stay.
Hilliard: Right.
Carmen: Can you share a moment from your career that profoundly changed your understanding of cult dynamics and coercive control?
Hilliard: I would say during my work in Utah, when I was a case manager working in Salt Lake City, Utah Valley, helping women, children and young men who were leaving fundamentalist Mormon polygamist populations all across the western U.S. One of those groups was people who were leaving the FLDS. Many of us had heard about the FLDS. We’ve seen and heard news footage about Warren Jeffs, their leader, who’s now in jail, and the community still continues on. Culturally, I mean, this is a group that is solely for people born and raised in the group. Very rarely do people convert in. And something that I found to be really impactful was that there was this one time where I was helping a family who had a son who was in his teens, and the dad, you know, had probably three to four other wives — was living the lifestyle down in southern Utah — and the son wanted to run away.
He didn’t want to live that lifestyle, and he was starting to act out and cause a lot of trouble for the family, and the dad did this really amazing thing of being like, “OK, I think I need to contact an agency for help because I don’t essentially want my son to resent me, like I want to do what’s best for him. And even though I would wish for him to stay in the group, I would much rather give power of attorney to a family who I know could provide for him, take care of him.” And that was a really special moment because I felt like that rarely happened. And I remember driving down to southern Utah and meeting with this father, and he just signed over power of attorney, and he just looked at me, and he said, “I just want you to know how much I love my son.” And I said, “I can tell.” And just because he’s signing over power of attorney, I think a lot of people would assume that he’s given up on his kid or he doesn’t care, but he knew the constraints of the lifestyle of that high-control group. And he also knew that his son was so ready to be free of that environment, so he wanted to be a source of support for him long term. And the best way to do that was to support him being integrated into a family outside of the community. I think we have this vision of men or women who are in this lifestyle, and maybe people don’t know what to expect or how to interact with folks who are in really isolated communities. And I just found the encounter just so moving.
Carmen: Wow. You were explaining how some would think it’s him giving up, but that’s the exact opposite. That’s him showing up for his son. That’s incredible. It’s very moving. You have mentioned that coercion can happen not just in cults, but also in workplaces, relationships and wellness communities. Can you talk more about that?
Hilliard: What I can say is maybe not everyone has been involved in a quote-unquote cult. And under the show, I explore what cult means because I think even that is a definitional term that can be confusing for people. But we have all experienced manipulation. We’ve all been influenced, but I’d say all of us have been scammed at some point in our lifetime. We have all experienced the feeling of “this isn’t what I thought it was,” right? And coercive control is a little bit more sinister than just a controlling act or behavior. Coercive control is a repeated intentional pattern of making someone feel abused, humiliated and isolated. And the sole purpose of control is to remove someone’s autonomy. And coercive control happens over a very slow period of time, where it starts with things that may seem a little bit benign, and then it ramps up into much more extreme acts.
And it’s hard for people once they’re in a coercive, controlling relationship to leave because it confuses the brain. It creates what I like to call a double bind. That person who you thought was once safe, or that wellness community or the workplace. has now turned into your greatest source of threat and has sort of isolated you from people on the outside. And so once you sort of realize what’s going on, it creates a double bind for the brain because you have this reference point of, “Oh, they weren’t always that way. They used to make me feel really good.” And you have been conditioned over time to only come to them if you need something. And so it creates a real psychological, I guess, conundrum for folks. These relationships exist in all these different domains. I mean, it could be a club, sports team, an abusive coach, an abusive boyfriend or girlfriend relationship. Parents can be abusive. I mean, there’s just a whole range.
Carmen: What can your audience expect from this experience that they wouldn’t find in a podcast or streaming series with your show?
Hilliard: I’m really excited to, I guess, bring a degree of really digestible, understandable knowledge for people because the psychology of cults can be very academic at times with how it’s presented. And I’m really excited to distill it down in a way that people can not only get, but also understand how this could happen to them, and also how to protect themselves, what to look out for. And if you have a loved one in a group, maybe how to help someone, how to better understand the experience of someone in a cult. And I’m really excited about the Q&A at the end of the show. We’re going to have a live audience Q&A. You have the chance to scan a QR code, submit your question, and I am really looking forward to answering people’s questions. That sort of level of interaction is not something that you could typically get out of listening to a podcast. So I’m really lucky and I’m really excited to hit the road to meet people.
