Amazon’s ‘Shiny Happy People’ Has Lessons to Teach, If We’re Willing to Listen

ALEX HARRIS
TGC (The Gospel Coalition)
June 2, 2023

It can be messy and confusing when outsiders poke around and try to tell a story about the church.

This is especially true when the focus is on some group or "scandal" most of us are already embarrassed about but don't think fairly represents us or our faith. We can speculate about the agenda of those who seek out these stories, and see all too clearly what they missed, glossed over, or got wrong. There will inevitably be examples of where these storytellers paint with too broad a brush or give a free platform to people eager to throw stones at a faith they've left behind.

This would be an understandable reaction to Amazon's four-part docuseries Shiny Happy People, now streaming on Prime Video.

The series focuses on the Duggars—the ultraconservative homeschool family made famous by TLC's hit reality show 19 Kids and Counting then rocked by sexual abuse, infidelity, and child pornography scandals perpetrated by their oldest son. It also explores the influence of disgraced Christian teacher Bill Gothard, one of the most powerful leaders of the Christian homeschooling movement and a key proponent of "Quiverfull" theology (i.e., that parents should, in obedience to Psalm 127, have as many children as God will give them). In 2014, Gothard resigned from his sprawling parachurch organization, the Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP), after dozens of women accused him of sexual abuse and harassment going back decades.

Coming on the heels of The Secrets of Hillsong (FX/Hulu) and last year's God Forbid (Hulu) on Liberty University's Jerry Falwell Jr., it may be hard for some in the church to stomach yet another exposé of abuse, hypocrisy, and downright weirdness by those who claim the name of Christ.

The temptation is to tune out. But should we?

Full Disclosure

Before going further, I should confess I'm not an impartial reviewer.

I grew up at the forefront of the Christian homeschooling movement. My parents, Gregg and Sono Harris, were prominent homeschool leaders in the 1980s and '90s and educated me and my six siblings at home. While we weren't involved in IBLP, I had many close friends who were. And my family and I helped popularize to a more mainstream evangelical audience some of the same ideas Gothard promoted: from homeschooling and "courtship" to strict rules for female modesty and obedience to authority.

I had a wonderful homeschool experience, for which I'll always be grateful. At its best, I see in the Christian homeschooling movement a work of genuine educational reform and spiritual renewal for countless families.

But while I remain firmly in the fold, I have peers—including members of my own family—who have left the church, rejecting not just their upbringing but faith itself in response to evils they experienced and false gospels they were taught.

Perhaps more unusual for a reviewer, I also appear in several episodes of Shiny Happy People. A year ago, the filmmakers invited me to sit down for an interview, not to talk about the Duggars or Gothard but to discuss the bigger story of the Christian homeschooling movement and the "Joshua Generation."

The Joshua Generation is an influential concept—one I embraced most of my life—that my generation would rise up and attain positions of power and influence in government, law, and beyond, and in so doing help restore the United States as a Christian nation.

There are many problems with that vision of political engagement, and this isn't the place to get into them fully. Suffice it to say that as believers our hope isn't in princes or earthly power, and the United States isn't a new Israel.

But the Joshua Generation story is one worth telling. It's an ambitious plot that has been far more successful than most people realize, and it helps explain much of our current political, cultural, and spiritual moment. To the extent someone was trying to tell even part of that story, I wanted to help them do it accurately—ideally paired with a more biblical vision for Christian engagement with politics and culture.

I also chose to participate to make clear that even those of us with good homeschool experiences have real concerns about aspects of the movement, to buttress the voices of those understandably hurt and even angry.

It can be far too easy for those of us in the church to dismiss the stories of those who've "deconstructed"; to take issue with their choices, tone, and new beliefs (or lack thereof); and to move much too quickly past the sins, abuses, and hypocrisies that caused so much pain.

I spent a full day with the filmmakers last July, knowing I'd ultimately have no control over which of my words would be used or how they'd be used. I've spent the past 11 months wondering how it would all turn out.

Searing, Imperfect Series

The wait is finally over and, while far from perfect, Shiny Happy Peopleaccomplishes its primary goal: it's a searing indictment of Gothard's teachings and, for those previously unfamiliar with it, a thorough introduction to the rotten fruit of the IBLP empire.

The narrative is engrossing and deeply troubling, weaving together archival footage and IBLP materials with compelling interviews with individuals who grew up in IBLP—most notably Jill Duggar Dillard, one of the oldest Duggar daughters, whose words and revelations anchor much of the series.

I know people who had positive experiences with IBLP. These were homeschool families with parents who genuinely sought to honor God and do what was best for their children. I also know people who experienced every bit of the trauma the series exposes.

Shiny Happy People is in many ways an ideal supplement to a book by another of the Duggar daughters, Jinger Duggar Vuolo. In Becoming Free Indeed, Vuolo engages in a systematic theological takedown of Gothard's controlling, fear-based, and gospel-distorting teachings, sharing her own journey of disentangling her faith and holding on to Christ. Shiny Happy People brings Gothard's false teachings to life. Vuolo's book provides hope that true gospel faith can rise from the ashes.

The series's strength might also be its biggest weakness, especially for an evangelical audience. With its focus on the Duggars, Gothard, and IBLP, the episodes can feel narrow—a sordid story about "other people." On the few occasions the filmmakers try to connect Gothard's teachings to broader themes in Christianity, the attempts are invariably heavy handed, often equating Gothard's genuine extremism with beliefs held by the vast majority of evangelicals. That may have been a considered choice on the filmmakers' part, but it preaches to the choir of evangelicalism's detractors rather than engaging in the more difficult task of persuasion.

The series does include a segment on the Joshua Generation, but the discussion is ultimately superficial, with little to no exploration of the context, ideas, or individuals behind the movement or attempt to accurately situate it within the larger "Christian Right" and our current political moment. Perhaps most disappointing to me, there's no discussion of what a more faithful approach to Christian political engagement might look like.

Why We Shouldn't Look the Other Way

Despite Shiny Happy People's shortcomings, it'd be a great loss to the church if thoughtful Christians, pastors, and other ministry leaders choose to look the other way.

Looking the other way is how this happened in the first place.

While he has few defenders in high places these days, and while some now attempt to dismiss his influence, Gothard is no fringe figure. His father served for a time as the executive director of The Gideons International, and Gothard received two degrees from Wheaton College. Long before turning his attention to a burgeoning Christian homeschool community in the 1980s, Gothard was presenting his "Basic Seminar" to packed coliseums around the country and winning the support and patronage of prominent Christian politicians, businessmen, and ministry leaders.

And yet even a cursory examination of Gothard's core teachings reveals his distortion of the gospel. Strict obedience to Gothard's "principles" guarantees spiritual and material success, like a fundamentalist version of the "prosperity" or "health and wealth" gospel. Disobedience opens you to Satan's attacks and sudden disaster.

Whatever wisdom or biblical insight was otherwise included in IBLP materials, the end result was a controlling, fear-based religion, where women and children were especially vulnerable to abuse of all kinds.

To be sure, there were some early criticisms of Gothard's principles, but those were few and far between. Tragically, it turned out that many who were quick to spot "liberal drift" and denounce the prosperity preachers on TV had little to say about an ultraconservative Bible teacher shaping the daily lives of millions.

An article in a 1984 issue of The Journal of Pastoral Practice suggests part of the reason was pastors "not wanting to run the risk of offending their congregation or constituency," among whom Gothard likely had some "avid followers." That article was published only a few years after the first major sex abuse scandal in Gothard's organization, including public accusations of impropriety and "moral failures" involving Gothard and a secretary.

How many evils could have been prevented if faithful Christians hadn't looked away?

As Christians, we should be willing to listen to and humbly learn from criticism, even when imperfectly delivered.

For those willing to answer that call, Shiny Happy People is a good place to start.

 

https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/shiny-happy-people/

 

Inside the real-life Handmaid's Tale cult where women are barred from having email, bank accounts and leaving home without permission

Handmaid's Tale

Three women who lived in religious cults like "Quiverfull" - where men are dominant and women treated as subservient - have written about experiences eerily similar to the dystopian novel now a hit TV show

NATASHA PURKIS

The Mirror
June 12, 2017


You are a baby making machine whose role is serve men, and the only job available is to move toxic waste - employment that will ultimately kill you.

That's the reality for women in The Handmaid's Tale, the iconic Margaret Atwood book and now a new TV series.

In the story, if you don't marry a man of high social calibre, but you are "fertile", you become a "Handmaid", subject to rape, torture and even murder.

Channel 4’s chilling adaptation of The Handmaid’s Tale, staring Elisabeth Moss, is shocking viewers with its depiction of a puritan cult, whose members set out to cleanse and save the world.

They overthrow the US government and set up a new totalitarian society, stripping women of their rights and organising them into categories depending on their usefulness.

Based on Atwood’s 1985 dystopian novel, the series is set in the future but to many it will feel like taking a step back in time where equality and choice disappear from existence.

Atwood has in the past insisted the story is an anti-prediction, based on what humanity has already done before, a scary-thought that makes you think back on the actions of humanity, both past and present.

While the concept of ‘handmaids’ may seem like an impossible concept to us, this type of reproductively driven cult-culture actually exists.

And is very real for these three women who have blogged about their experiences.
‘You were created to help meet the needs of men’

Hannah Ettinger is the eldest of nine and was expected to help her mother raise her siblings, cook and clean, from a young age, while her father went out to bring home the bacon.

Her duty as stated by the Quiverfull community that she was born into, was to provide her husband with children.

An alarming concept that makes Atwood’s anti-prediction from the 80’s ring rather true.

Hannah was a member of the Quiverfull movement whose rules are based on King James’ version of the bible and Psalm 127 which claims that God blesses a man whose ‘quiver is full’ - basically meaning that having a lot of children meant you rank higher in God’s good books.

Hannah belonged to a Quiverfull community, in the US, who upheld ‘traditional’ family values, were anti-abortion and didn’t allow women to have an email or bank accounts, or even leave the house without their husband’s permission.

In her article on The Establishment , she says the command of her community was: “Have children and raise them in this aggressively conservative faith, and then there will be more “true” believer Christians in the world to bring about cultural revolution in the name of Jesus Christ.”

They took a terror-based approach of conceiving children to serve in the front line of the culture war they faced, trying to ‘bring back Christian greatness to America’.

Sounding worryingly Trump-like.

On a day to day basis, Hannah attended a small, far-right Christian college in Western Pennsylvania where she was taught the will of God, the role of women and that she very much lived in a man’s world.

In 2010 her teacher told them to read Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale, warning them that it went against everything they stood for and would probably offend and shock them. Instead it showed her possibilities and that women can have rights and lives of their own fulfillment, and why shouldn’t they?

Atwood’s novel sparked a chain reaction in Hannah’s life, fueling her with the courage to break free from her cult-community.

Firstly she divorced her husband, after he suggested he could love her again if she were a mother.

When he invited to her to lunch after their divorce was finalised, she turned down the offer as she was already running late to her appointment to have a contraceptive IUD fitted.

She defiantly left her Quiverfull cult, ceased to have a relationship with her father in the process and got a powerful tattoo in tribute to Atwood’s poignant phrase; ‘don’t let the bastards grind you down’.

Hannah now researches economic policy, writes an online blog and is taking a Masters degree. Although she admits it was tough getting used to being allowed to have your own ideas as you don’t even know what you like, it is better than living a half life.
‘Because you are a woman, you are not as important’

Kaya Dawn is another survivor of a Christofascist cult-culture.

She was trained to be a ‘Helpmeet’ - a woman whose sole purpose was to help meet the needs of her husband and reading Hannah’s story prompted her to write about her experience on her blog.

Like Hannah, Kaya was home-schooled and her education was controlled and led, again, by the right-wing preachings of the King James bible, that reminded her daily of her place as man’s helper.

Her everyday routine involved attending a women’s group led by her mother, where the girls of the community were herded up and told that this was the only way of life for women and they had a job to do.

In her preparation for marrying ‘a Kenyan man of God’ she was instructed by her mother to read Debi Pearl’s Created to be his Helpmeet .

In her book Pearl tries to promote a ‘righteous way of life’ and tell girls how to serve their man as they are an accessory to him achieving the will of God.

Kaya questioned the concept of the book and the role of women in her community, and was given a 4 hour lecture on her role in society, forcing her to accept it.

In her blog on WordPress , she says: “They did not stop until we demonstrated, honestly or not, our content and understanding of our helpmeet statuses.”

However, this backfired, with Kaya understanding the text to mean that because she was a woman, she was not as important - she was just created to complete man, that was her whole purpose.


This epiphanic moment sparked her fleeing from the cult confines she was born into.

An everyday ritual for Kaya had been to pray for her future husband she was yet to meet.

But after reading Pearl’s ridiculously oppressive book, Kaya claims she could no longer sincerely do this, and started to pray for herself instead.


She asked God to make her ‘the woman she needed to be’ and ended up breaking free from the chains of this cult-culture, becoming her own helpmeet.
‘Your role in life is to breed’

Kieryn Darkwater claims that she too was trained in preparation for ‘the culture wars’.

Like Hannah, she was brought up in cult that also belonged to the Quiverfull subculture and was told that her role was to breed.

Their violent mantra states that they must take the US back for Christ and outbreed, outvote and out-activate those whose beliefs do not align with theirs, saying “they must not be allowed to continue”.

In her article on Autostraddle, she says: “I was taught by every pastor I encountered that it was our job as Christians to outbreed the secularists (anyone not a far-right evangelical Protestant) and take over the government through sheer numbers.”

Kieryn recognised that her cult’s agenda comes from a place of ‘passion and dedication’ and acknowledges that they are part of a movement based on fear of newness.

She describes them as resilient and in it for the long haul and says they believe that there is no room in America for anyone who believes differently to them.

She has since escaped her cult-community and now voices her fears that Trump’s far-right foot in the door of American democracy, will serve the purpose of the Quiverfull movement and their desires for a Christofascist takeover of the US government.
The future?

In The Handmaid’s Tale women are not allowed to read in case it gave them ideas - here, the reason all these three women have broken free from their bonds to a Christofascist cult is because they have been able to access a world outside of what they are contained to.

Maybe the totalitarian uprising in The Handmaid’s Tale was so successful because they eliminated any trace of a life outside of a Christofascist life.

But is that not what the Quiverfull movement is seeking to do right now?

Turning women into breeding-machines in their attempt to permanently repair American politics and culture, convincing them there is no alternative life for them that God would approve of.

The Handmaid’s Tale continues next Sunday on Channel 4 at 9pm.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/real-life-stories/inside-real-life-handmaids-tale-10608305

The Women Fighting Back Against the Christian Cult that Forbids Birth Control

Dylan Brethour
Vice
October 22, 2016

What is Quiverfull? For an outsider, they are a difficult group to pin down: there's no single denomination and no leader. Even the term "Quiverfull" is contentious, with many members rejecting the title, which derives from a Psalm in which children metaphorically are referred to as arrows. Instead, what binds this elusive Christian movement together is a radical emphasis on male authority and big families. Women are encouraged to throw away their birth control and submit to their husbands.

Former member Suzanne explains: "Quiverfull families believe that they have to trust the Lord with their family planning... It's based off the idea that God intends to fill your quiver and blessed is the man whose quiver is full of arrows." Another ex-member, Vyckie Garrison, calls Quiverfull "pro-life rhetoric on steroids". I spoke to both women about why they joined, life as a true believer, and what finally pushed them to leave.

"Back in the early 90s, my youngest child was very ill," Suzanne tells me. "I was kind of at my wits' end, because I thought I was going to lose my child. I was in that 'let's bargain with God' stage." She and her husband found a church and decided to remain after their daughter recovered. Over time, however, the group became increasingly radical. Despite her doubts, Suzanne was emotionally vulnerable after her daughter's brush with death and found it difficult to leave.

"I'm a failed Quiverfull mama," she tells me. "I had nine miscarriages the years we were part of the Quiverfull movement." She was blamed by the community for the miscarriages. "It would be things like, in a prayer circle, they would say 'Please let's pray for our dear sister Suzanne, that God reveals to her the unconfessed sin in her life. That will lead to her having a child.'" She was told going to the doctor was idolatry.

So why stay? "Because in many ways, I felt like I had a family for the first time in my life. I thought I had strong connections to others and it was like we thought we were doing God's work." Eventually Suzanne's medical problems forced her to have a hysterectomy. Fearful for her health, her husband began pressuring her to leave. She followed him out of the group reluctantly. "They teach you total submission to your husband," she says, "so my husband wanted to leave, I submitted and I went with him."

Like Suzanne, Vyckie Garrison was once a devoted Quiverfull wife and mother. "I obviously drank the Kool-Aid all the way to the bottom on the cup," she laughs. Why she was attracted to Quiverfull? "Probably my messed up background," she says. "I don't think anybody really gets into Quiverfull unless they have some major issues to begin with." Vyckie tells me her home life was unstable as a child. "That made me look for answers, look for security. I wanted to have a formula for having a good life and not fucking it up." For her, this was the appeal of religion. "I thought that's what I got through the Bible, oh look here, this is what God wants."

How a Pageant Queen Turned a Topless
The group's focus on pregnancy had terrible health consequences for Vyckie. She had serious complications after trying to have a home birth following three C-sections. "The whole hospital staff was just appalled about my physical condition. They were like, why? why did you even take this risk when you could have just gone to a doctor?" That didn't stop her. "I did it again. And that time I did have a home birth, my last one. I had a partial uterine rupture and again, almost died, almost lost the baby. The doctors were all like, why are you even doing this? You have to stop."

"It's been long enough but I'm beginning to think I was insane," she tells me. "But in my mind I was just being completely dedicated to God and his word. I used to say that Quiverfull was this really powerful head trip. It's more of a mindset than anything." Unlike most cults, there is no single charismatic leader in Quiverfull. However, Vyckie explains, "it's definitely the cultic mindset and what's happening is that each family becomes its own little cult."

Fear of the devil kept her in the church. "You're talking eternity, you believe that there is a literal hell, there is separation from God, that your children are going to be tormented forever," she tells me."Just to have that assurance, that confidence, that you're in the will of God and he is going to protect you and protect your children, that was my main motivation. I really wanted the kids to be okay, I wanted them to have that spiritual safety."

Quiverfull also offered a way to improve her troubled marriage. As a fundamentalist, she says, "you can't divorce, because God hates divorce, [so] you've got to find a way to make it work." Submission seemed like a solution. The husband is supposed to be head of the household "and it's like okay, I know I can't change him but what if I can influence the one who can change him. So it's like you're trying to obligate God to fix your husband through your submission." Vyckie continues: "You think that by controlling yourself you're actually influencing spiritual entities to work on your behalf, it's a mega-twisted coping mechanism."

Eventually, she said, "It all got to me." She was isolated, her marriage was failing, and her children were unhappy. "I'm thinking, for all this effort, things should be going way better than this." At the same time she began an email correspondence with a secular uncle, trying to explain her religious convictions. "The more that I tried, the more I realised unless you actually believe this premise, that the Bible is the living word of God, none of this makes sense. It fact, it's kind of weird and twisted." Finally, she says, "I went and re-examined everything and after a while, I realised I just don't believe enough of this to be able to call myself a Christian any more."

Vyckie divorced her husband and put her kids in school. "I just started doing regular life," she says. In a mark of how much her life has changed, she's received the Atheist of the Year award from the American Atheist Association. Today, Vyckie and Suzanne run the blog No Longer Quivering. The site has become the main online hub for people leaving the movement. After years of submission, both women are fighting back.

http://www.vice.com/en_au/read/quiverfull-christian-women-leaving-evangelical

Salvation Army bans Duggar cult’s ‘retreat’ that promoted arranged marriages for teen girls

VYCKIE GARRISON
The Raw Story
May 5, 2016

Teen girl 

A Christian retreat for Quiverfull fathers to marry off their teen daughters has been cancelled after Raw Story readers expressed concerns that the event constitutes human trafficking and contacted the Salvation Army which owns the campground where that retreat was scheduled to be held in Wichita.

Quiverfull patriarch, Vaughn Ohlman, organized a “Get Them Married” retreat for the purpose of providing a weekend where ultra-conservative Christian fathers could network with like-minded families “(and their unmarried young men and women) who are committed to young, fruitful marriage and to help them overcome the barriers which have kept their children unmarried.”

The Raw Story article sparked outrage among readers and many were moved to action, demanding that authorities be notified in order to protect the children who were slated to be married off young for the purpose of procreating lots of babies for Jesus.

Readers discovered that Camp Hiawatha, where the retreat was planned to be held, is owned by the Salvation Army. I contacted a good friend who is a officer at the Salvation Army’s training school in Chicago, and she responded right away to let me know the Wichita corps has already denied access to Ohlman’s group for what would have amounted to a child trafficking “retreat.”

Kudos to the Salvation Army for their quick and appropriate response to a truly wicked and sick bunch of patriarchs’ plans to profit from the “Bride Price” of their virgin daughters.

Update: The Salvation Army of Wichita/Sedgwick County released a statement on the group’s decision, as seen below.

The Salvation Army has denied a request by the Let Them Marry organization to conduct its event at Camp Hiawatha.
Our decision is based upon our long-standing concern for the welfare of children. At The Salvation Army, we work every single day to provide a safe, caring place for children, many of whom have been left vulnerable due to the actions of adults.

We remain steadfastly focused on our mission of advocating for and protecting children.

http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/salvation-army-bans-duggar-cults-retreat-that-promoted-arranged-marriages-for-teen-girls/

You probably know a Quiverfull family — this anti-women Christian cult is everywhere

VYCKIE GARRISON
ALTERNET
Raw Story
March 31,  2016

 
There’s been some speculation recently about whether the Willis Family, the musically-talented mega-family of 14 featured on TLC’s creatively-titled reality TV show, “The Willis Family,” follows theQuiverfull movement.

Toby and Brenda Willis, along with their one dozen lovely children, appear strikingly similar to TLC’s scandal-ridden Duggar Family … only with considerably more talent and rather less legalism. Like JimBob and Michelle, the Christian couple follows most, but not all of the lifestyle particulars promoted and practiced byQuiverfull families based on their “biblical worldview".

Both the Willises and the Duggars share a strong faith and believe all children are an unmitigated blessing from God, both families embrace traditional gender roles, they homeschool and believe that college education is not a priority for their passels of kids, they both reject contemporary dating and believe adult children should seek parental approval of their future spouses, they insist on chastity before marriage, disapprove of comprehensive sex-education, both families home-church and teach their children that the earth was created in six days.

JimBob & Michelle adhere to many of the most oppressive parenting practices found in strict fundamentalist Christian homes such as stern obedience training for infants and toddlers, no television in the home and limited access to contemporary entertainment and culture, heavily-monitored computer and cell phone use, and very modest clothing to ensure their daughters are mostly covered so as not to “defraud” horny teenage boys (as the Duggars have discovered, this method of “protecting” young girls doesn’t work), … their list of rules is endless, as is typical of Quiverfull families.

By comparison, Toby and Brenda are almost permissive parents. Their children are involved in a number of non-religious-based activities, and while they dress in what most would consider modest apparel, they’re certainly not afraid to show some skin. Bare arms and short skirts … obviously, this is not a truly Quiverfull family, right?!

They actually seem kinda normal.

It may seem like an exaggeration to say that Quiverfull families are everywhere, but when I describe the worldview and lifestyle, it never fails that at least one (usually several) people will recognize they personally know a Quiverfull family.

You probably do too.

Here’s a map of the U.S. from a website called The National Center for Family Integrated Churches (NCFIC) in which “Family Integrated” is code words for Quiverfull. NCFIC provides a network where Quiverfull churches and individual families can register in the hopes of finding “likeminded” fellowship and friends in their own communities.

The NCFIC interactive map reveals that Truly True Christians™ are not concentrated in the Bible Belt. Wherever there are people, there are Quiverfull believers.

I once had a reporter from Sacramento tell me she doubted there were many Quiverfull Christians in her area. I pointed her to the NCFIC website where she was able to find quite a few, including a pastor who was willing to go on record stating that in a truly biblical society, women would not have the right to vote.

A Christian couple does not need to have a dozen or more kids to be Quiverfull, and not every extra large family follows the Quiverfull ideology. This is because, at the core, Quiverfull is not so much about how many children a couple has as it is about a MINDSET: it’s a way of viewing life through the lens of biblical literalism. A Quiverfull family is simply one that believes the Bible is the inerrant Word of God containing eternal principles for marriage and family AND they are actually putting those principles into practice in their daily lives.

Inquistor writer, Mandy Robinson points to the fact that Brenda Willis says the couple won’t be having a 13th child as evidence that the Willises are not Quiverfull. Brenda suffered a uterine rupture during the home birth of baby #11 – a quick trip to the hospital for a cesarean delivery saved her and the baby’s lives. But even the couple’s use of whatever form of birth control they’re relying on to prevent a potentially deadly conception does not automatically disqualify the Willis family from being Quiverfull believers.

Like I said, it’s all about what’s going on in their heads. After the uterine rupture, Brenda quickly (presumably unintentionally) conceived again – a pregnancy which she describes as “very tough.” Even knowing that she was risking her life, Brenda “chose” to continue the pregnancy and give birth to baby #12. That she was willing to martyr herself is a firm indication that she believes, as the Bible teaches, that God alone is the creator and giver of life … she believes strongly enough to live (or die) according to the words written in that Book.

Michelle Duggar has gone on record as being willing to conceive again (against her doctor’s advice) … she would accept death by childbirth as “God’s will.” This is because Michelle is obviously so enthrall to the Quiverfull ideal found in Psalm 127, “Children are a blessing from the Lord … happy is the man who has his quiver full of them,” that nothing – not even death – will deter her from fulfilling what she believes is God’s ultimate purpose for women: to serve her husband and to bear children.

Brenda Willis is fully convinced as well.

Her decision not to have another baby was based on her husband, Toby’s desire to not be a widowed father of 13. It’s what HE wanted. Nowhere does Brenda indicate that she put her foot down and said, “Enough!”

I once knew a young Quiverfull mom who struggled with hyperemesis gravidarum(horrific “morning sickness” all day, every day) for the entire pregnancy. She suffered miserably through six pregnancies in about 8 years, all the while, caring for infants and toddlers, and homeschooling the older children. She and her husband are True Believers™ … he heads a busy ministry and eventually, her exhaustion and inability to keep up with all the “help meet” demands of the Quiverfull lifestyle became too much for him to bear. Although their bible-based belief system clearly forbids all forms of contraception, he pulled his “head of the house” card and unilaterally decided she would not get pregnant again. He had a vasectomy.

My friend was devastated (though at the same time, I suspect she was secretly relieved) … God gave her a womb for His divine purpose, but her husband demanded she not use it.What choice did she have but to submit to his God-appointed authority over her body?

So how do you spot a truly Quiverfull family?

Look for the woman’s unwavering submission to God, to the Bible, and to her husband’s will. Look for sacrificial devotion to “biblical family values.” The Quiverfull philosophy is simply standard “pro-life” rhetoric on steroids. It is Christian couples unhypocritically living out the principles of marriage and family which the majority of evangelicals believe to be “biblical.”

I’ve said this before, and I cannot say it often enough: the reason you can find Quiverfull families everywhere – in your community, in your neighborhood, perhaps even in your own family, is because Quiverfull beliefs are not actually a radical departure from traditional Christian teachings regarding marriage and family. It is my contention that Quiverfull IS regular Christianity writ large … lived out to its logical conclusion.

Vyckie Garrison was once a minor celebrity in the Quiverfull Movement, made famous by TV’s Duggar family. As a devout, Bible-believing Christian and the mother of seven homeschooled children, Garrison spent 16 years, with her husband, publishing a newspaper for families on a similar path. Today, via a website called No Longer Quivering, she publishes resources for women leaving the movement.

https://www.rawstory.com/2016/03/you-probably-know-a-quiverfull-family-the-anti-women-christian-cult-getting-bolstered-by-reality-tv/

Duggar cult survivor wants you to meet the powerful women who make other women’s lives a living hell

VYCKIE GARRISON
ALTERNET
February 24, 2016       

 

Nancy Campbell (YouTube)

“ …Older women … admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.” Titus 2:3-5

Quiverfull is a growing fundamentalist movement within evangelical Christianity which shuns all forms of birth control and follows the “biblical” marriage model of male headship and female submission.

Think Duggar Family.

JimBob & Michelle Duggar with their 19 kids and growing extended family are the embodiment of today’s back-to-Patriarchy biblical family values movement: half a dozen kids or more, homeschool, home church, home birth, modest dress, heavy emphasis on homemaking for women and girls, rejection of higher education and all things modern including popular music, movies, television, and science … children are sheltered, no dating allowed, but instead, kids are pushed via parent-led courtship and betrothal toward early marriage and exuberant spawning.

Quiverfull is a contemporary manifestation of capital-p Patriarchy, but what if I told you that the majority of fundamentalist Christians pushing women to live Quiverfull lives of wifely submission and prolific childbearing are WOMEN?

Believe it … because it’s the truth!

Titus 2 Women

Admittedly, the public face of Quiverfull (also known as “Complementarity”) is overwhelmingly male: John Piper of the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, John MacArthur of Grace to You ministries, Dennis Rainey, radio host of Family Life Today, mega-church Pastor David Platt, who is president of the Southern Baptist Convention’s International Mission Board and author of “Counter Culture” which calls on women to ditch feminism in favor of wifely submission, Voddie Baucham, author of “What He Must Be If He Wants To Marry My Daughter,” Scott Brown of the National Center for Family Integrated Churches (in which “family integrated” is code words for Quiverfull), “Kill The Gays” pastor, Kevin Swanson, the “pissing pastor,” Steve Anderson, and so so many more.

But honestly, no sensible woman would give these misogynistic jerks the time of day if it weren’t for the influence of dedicated Christian female mentors: the “older women” of Titus 2 whom the apostle Paul charged to “teach the younger women” to be obedient keepers at home.

In the past, influential women like Phyllis Schlafly, Beverly LaHaye, Elizabeth Elliott, Edith Schaeffer, and Mary Pride decried the rise of feminism and the devaluation of full-time motherhood and homemaking.

Today, one of the leading ministries influencing Christian women to adopt bronze-age roles of rabid fecundity and hyper-domesticity is Above Rubies, a magazine “to encourage women in their high calling as wives and mothers” which has a worldwide circulation of nearly 200,000. The magazine and correlating ministry are headed by a charismatic and commanding woman named Nancy Campbell.

“Mother, you are not wasting your life in your home. God says that children are at the very center of life in the kingdom of God. When you take time to hold a little child on your lap, you are wielding a mighty power. You are in the perfect will of God. You are not only doing something that is good. You are doing what is BEST. You are in the very center of God’s heart.” -NancyCampbell

Other prominent female leaders in the Christian Patriarchy movement include:

Nancy (Leigh) DeMoss Wolgemuth of Revive Our Hearts Radio  and the True Woman Movement, as well as author of the book, “Lies Women Believe” … “lies” such as these: “I have my rights,” “If I submit to my husband, I’ll be miserable,” and “It’s up to us to determine the size of our family.”


Debi Pearl, author of Created To Be His Help Meet, teaches wives to study their husbands’ idiosyncrasies in order to anticipate and meet the patriarchs’ every need. To the wife of an abusive husband, Debi has this advice:

God says that as a husband looks on and sees the way his wife responds to him, he will be won. He will hear and see her cheerful countenance. He will notice her willingness to help and forgive. He will see her giving up her rights and not taking offense when he knows he has wronged her. He will see she honors him, obeys him, treats him with respect, and serves him with a non-rebellious, non-resistant attitude. He will see her spirit is not raging outwardly in emotional fits or inwardly in silent brooding of hurt, but her spirit is quiet, restful, and peaceful. He will see she doesn’t puff up and talk incessantly in criticism of him—or others. He trusts her. He knows she is not going to discuss him with her pastor or friend. He sees she is wise with what little money he gives her. She is a remarkable woman, not because she is classy in the way she dresses or looks, but in the way she controls her spirit. She rejoices for an opportunity to bless him, and he knows her heart is good. He tries her; he deliberately tempts her into hurt or anger; he judges her unfairly; he demands things of her that he knows embarrasses her, yet she is in subjection to him in all things. And in the end, she wins him by her chaste conversation. It is a promise from God to you.

“Lady Lydia” Sherman and Jennie Chancey of Ladies Against Feminism — a website devoted to “promoting beautiful womanhood.”

Kelly Crawford, mother of ten, blogs at the popular large-family, Christian homeschooling website, Generation Cedar.

Teri Maxwell, homeschooling mother of eight, who blogs about loving your husband and homeschooling your many, many children at Titus 2.

Other popular pro-patriarchy ministries which are run by women include: Young Wife’s Guide, The Humbled Homemaker, Loving Life at Home, Far Above Rubies, Equipping Godly Women, Hearts At Home, Victorious Christian Women, Simply Living For Him, In the Nursery of the Nation, Raising Olives, Molding Into a Lady, Christian Feminine Homemaking, Beautiful Life of Joy, Ladies in Godly Holy Teaching, Life in a Shoe, Large Families On Purpose, Proverbs 31 Ministries, Club 31 Women, Love Your Husband, Planet Mommyhood, Time-Warp Wife, …

Jesus Christ, there’s no end to the madness … but I am becoming weary and disheartened finding all these websites run by women who encourage other women to cooperate in their own oppression. Ugh.

This story becomes even more incredible when you consider that ordinarily young women would pay little more than lip service to the ideals espoused by these Titus 2 women and their back-to-the-old-old-ways ministries … except when an older, seemingly wiser woman from their church, bible study group, or homeschool co-op personally recommends taking a closer look. That’s when they really pay attention and take the pro-patriarchy teachings to heart.

You might be wondering, but why would any woman promote this garbage to her friends, family, and neighbors?

Why, Why, Why?

From my own experience, as well as from listening to the stories of the women from No Longer Quivering who have left the lifestyle and are in the process of healing from seriously abusive relationships, here are the most common reasons why Christian women follow Paul’s Titus 2 directive to pursuade younger women to devote their lives to the pursuit of biblical womanhood:

They’re married to losers

Every Christian woman knows the bible says that God hates divorce. While some churches allow a few exceptions to the “till death do we part” marriage vow – perhaps for reasons of abandonment or adultery – the primary message is that the union with her husband is a sacred representation of the relationship between Christ and the Church and she must therefore make every effort to save her marriage.

Take Anna Duggar for example. While it’s true that Josh cheated on Anna, she is being counseled to forgive him and to trust the Lord to restore their love and make something beautiful from her brokenness. Jesus said if you don’t forgive others for their sins, the Heavenly Father will not forgive yours. Sure Jesus allowed for divorce in the case of marital unfaithfulness, but he also noted that exception was granted “because of the hardness of their hearts.” In other words, in theory, Anna can divorce Josh – she has every right – BUT, in practicality, the only way she would/could is if she’s willing to admit to having a hard, unforgiving heart that’s too bitter to trust in God … and take her chances that Jesus will understand and not doom her to Hell for all eternity.

So what’s a good Christian woman to do if she’s married to deadbeat man?

She’ll have to dig in, try harder, pray more, trust more … be a better Christian. That’s where “biblical family values” come in: according to the Christian headship model, the more of herself she surrenders to God and submits to her husband, the greater the likeliness that the Holy Spirit will intervene and change her husband’s heart. (See Debi Pearl’s advice to an abused wife above.)

Christian women who are trapped in unhappy marriages will seek out biblical solutions, and when they discover the key: male headship and female submission, they tell their husbands in the hopes that he will do the godly-man thing: step up to the plate and lead the family in the paths of righteousness.

True story: I have never encountered a happy couple in an egalitarian partnership that, when presented with the bible verse, “The husband is the head of the wife …” actually took it seriously and changed their relationship patterns to fit the patriarchal blueprint for marriage. It is only when the marriage is already dysfunctional – when the husband and/or wife are controlling, manipulative, petty … abusive – these are the couples who latch on to Christian patriarchy and implement the strict gender roles in the extreme.

Tragically, the advice a troubled couple is most likely to receive in Christian marital counseling is the worst instruction ever and will only lend biblical credence to the abusive partner’s worst tendencies. The power imbalance which is inherent to the headship/submission model is guaranteed to compound every pre-existing problem and create new difficulties as the woman’s indiscriminate catering to her husband transforms him into a narcissist and herself into a living martyr.

The need to believe

The Quiverfull lifestyle is extraordinarily demanding and frankly, a truly stark and exhausting way to live. Everything must be done in the hardest, most tedious way possible.

A cursory perusal of Quiverfull blogs reveals the exponential demands of “biblical womanhood” including: perpetual pregnancy, child-bearing, adopting sibling groups, breastfeeding, baby wearing, chronic sleep deprivation, raising half a dozen or more closely-spaced, “stair-step” children, homeschooling – year round through chronic illness, child-training,character training, tomato-staking, discipling children, homemaking, penny-pinching, organic gardening, baking from scratch, once-a-month cooking, homesteading, sewing modest clothing, showing hospitality, operating a “cottage” business, staying trim, fit and healthy, and of course, serving as loving helpmeet … all without the modern woman’s “village” of helpers: daycare, preschool, play dates, public school, the boob-tube babysitter, pre-packaged and frozen foods, day spas, “me time,” credit cards, government assistance, “allopathic” medicine, Sunday School, youth group, therapists, Ritalin for the kids, or Xanax for mom.

These women pay a high personal price putting very lofty ideals into practice … and when you’re that invested in something so unconventional, you have to believe that you are not misguided, delusional, stupid, or just plain silly.

What better way to convince yourself than to convince others? So they order a bulk subscription to Above Rubies magazine and share the extra copies with their friends. They start a women’s group at church to study “Created To Be His Help Meet.” They quote bible verses to explain why they’re living the way they do in the hopes of making converts – misery loves company?

Money … of course!

Not every mega-family gets their own TV show to finance their procreative extravagance. The real reality is that many Quiverfull folk are barely getting by. The ultra-conservative lifestyle demands that Dad provides while Mom stays home with the kids. So these are one-income families supporting an impossible number of children: often a new baby every two years. Finances are further constrained when the family opts out of free public education in favor of homeschooling (revisionist history and creation science curriculum are not cheap!), refuses to accept any form of government assistance (because socialism) including Medicaid and food stamps, insists on debt-free living which means no home mortgages or credit cards to fall back on in emergencies, and some go so far as to forego home, health, and life insurance because it means trusting in a policy rather than in God. Add to that the biblical mandate to tithe the first 10% of their income to the church and to generously support various “pro-family” ministries with monthly donations.

(Side note: if you’re extra broke or just needing to put aside funds for a rainy day, check out all the money-saving, stretch-a-dollar tips on the above-linked Quiverfull blogs. These mega-moms are expert penny-pinchers and true Cheapskate Queens! Oh, need organization or time-management tips? … you will not believe how proficient these moms are at downsizing and delegating.)

One of Nancy Campbell’s daughters, Serene Allison, once wrote in Above Rubies magazine about a time when she had eight children aged 12 and under … due to poor plumbing, the family was without running water. Serene and her children were “forced to haul water from the stock tank (after breaking the ice), then fetch water down the hill and back up again in 5 gallon buckets, survive in a freezing cold house, then suffer as smoke billowed out of the wood stove, then wear goggles to keep smoke out of their eyes, then lay on the floor while the children opened doors and windows to air out the place.  Finally, to escape the smoke, they went outside in freezing weather to run laps around the house to stay warm.  And poor Serene cried.”

While truly godly women do not work outside their homes, many do help make ends meet by working from home in what is known as “cottage industries.” That’s exactly how Serene saved her family from dire poverty: she and her sister, Pearl wrote “a biblical approach to food freedom” and started the “Trim, Healthy Mama” movement to teach perpetually pregnant and nursing mothers how to slim down and keep the weight off once and for all. “Trim, Healthy Mama” is currently #2 in Amazon’s “health, fitness, and dieting” category.

Because God’s not happy enough for a woman to bear as many babies as her body is able to produce … the Quiverfull mom-of-many also must have vibrant health and a slim waistline.

Quiverfull is clearly a specialization of the “family values” niche market that has proven so profitable for the Christian publishing industry in general. So yeah – it is about MONEY and that’s a huge motivator. The idyllic big, happy, Christian family is so entrancing that TLC just announced they’re bringing back the lucrative Duggar Family for a “19 Kids and Counting” spin-off called, “Jill & Jessa: Counting On.”

And so it continues … a new generation of women teaching women to be submissive babymakers for Jesus.

Vyckie Garrison was once a minor celebrity in the Quiverfull Movement, made famous by TV’s Duggar family. As a devout, Bible-believing Christian and the mother of seven homeschooled children, Garrison spent 16 years, with her husband, publishing a newspaper for families on a similar path. Today, via a website called No Longer Quivering, she publishes resources for women leaving the movement.

https://www.rawstory.com/2016/02/duggar-cult-survivor-wants-you-to-meet-the-powerful-women-who-make-other-womens-lives-a-living-hell/

Will Anna Duggar be offered as the next live sacrifice to save the Duggar Family Brand? Scapegoating, Spread Your Legs Theology, and the Modern Molech

Cynthia Kunsman
AUGUST 22, 2015

Will Anna Duggar be offered as the next live sacrifice to save the Duggar Family Brand? Scapegoating, Spread Your Legs Theology, and the Modern Molech

I’ve tried for more than 48 hours to write this, but having watched this scenario play out with other followers of Bill Gothard, it brings up so many disturbing emotions for me, I found myself too caught up in them.  As the mediabegins to report, Anna Duggar will share in the blame for her husband’s sins and divorce will be strongly discouraged if not demonized.  I’ve watched it happen with other people who follow this belief system, over and over again.  

I don’t know how the family will make her the scapegoat for his behavior prior to their courtship, but they will scapegoat her for his infidelity.  The wife’s exemplary performance allegedly and magically prevents a husband from indulging in sin.  We see elements of this same mindset in the blaming behavior ofTullian Tchividjian.  Such magical thinking rests at the core of all of the beliefs within the Duggars’ cultic excuse for sanitized and superior Christianity.

Precipitating Events

In May of this year (2015), documentation of Josh Duggar’s molestation of several sisters went public.  He resigned his job, and his parents lost their Learning Channel Show which highlights their lifestyle built around the ideology promoted by Bill Gothard’s family-oriented teachings.  Their long standing relationship of mutual endorsement with Mike Huckabee dissolved.  I read in a tabloid that the Duggars approached the network with a new spinoff show idea wherein they would counsel sex abuse victims (shame-based/Gothard-style, I would assume).  A few days later, news broke about more of Josh Duggar’s questionable behavior when hackers released the names of subscribers to the Ashley Madison adultery website — a service that he stopped using in May when news of his predatory sexual behavior went public.  He and his parents confirmed the accuracy of his use of this adultery site on their family blog.

The Scapegoat

Under Old Testament Law, to atone for sin, a family was required to give one spotless sacrifice to be offered at the Temple to atone for their sins, but the Devil was given his due as well.  Each family also transferred their sins on to a goat which was sent out into the wilderness as an offering to Azazel, the name of a fallen angel (Leviticus 16).  Today, scapegoating represents a surrogate who is used to purge another individual or group of the appearance of wrongdoing.  This scapegoat “takes the fall” for another to restore them to good standing.

Berlet and Lyons identify scapegoating as one of the elements of how Right Wing Conservatives  process their experiences and respond to them within secular society.  Politically, it is a powerful “ideological weapon,” yet those within Christian Patriarchy also use scapegoating in family and personal relationships in much the same way.  It’s so much easier to lay blame on a demonized other than it is to either accept flawed reality or take responsibility for a less than perfect outcome.

The Woman Problem

Within the religion followed by the Duggars, gender hierarchy provides a convenient route for scapegoating which protects men and lets blame “roll downhill” on to women — including the blame for original sin.  One cannot fully understand the mindset of the Duggars until they acknowledge this scapegoating and the history of the theology that supports it.  One must also acknowledge the nature of the indoctrination that families like the Duggars endure, instilling them with empty promises that find their roots in disdain.  I’m sure Anna will be presented, over and over again with the challenge, “Me?  Obey him?”   Just as is true ofJohn Piper, Bill Gothard also draws on this tradition forged by John R. Rice which was carried on by the Independent Fundamental Baptist tradition.

I sincerely wish that I could say that this tradition started in the 20th Century, but I believe that all Rice did was draw on the sentiments of those who preceded him.  Author Bob Edwards just published a very moving postabout the long tradition of deception in Christianity and the deeply personal journey that drew him to this study.  It is well worth reading in its entirety, but this element of it describes just a portion of this long history of “the woman problem.”



Then I came across a historical book that continues to haunt me. It contained court transcripts of all of the women killed by men, acting on the authority of the church, during the Inquisition. It had their names, and the charges against them. Many of the women were found guilty of “witchcraft;” specifically, something called “love magic.” This meant that a man had allegedly been so bewitched by a woman that he couldn’t help committing adultery with her, or perhaps even raping her. Sexual sins committed by men were blamed exclusively on their female partners or victims. I read hundreds of names, maybe thousands. I lost count. I became dizzy. I didn’t realize it at first, but I had stopped breathing. I felt like I was going to die. Something inside me broke.

This notion that women must be subject to men had nothing to do with God, the gospel, servant-leadership, or the love of Jesus Christ. It was born of fear, hatred, and a felt “need” for control. It was prejudice, and it had led to subjugation, oppression and even mass murder.

Read more HERE about how Gothard and the theology that influenced him blame women and children for their own sexual assault.

“Spread Your Legs Theology”

I cannot begin to enumerate the contemporary references to this element of the scapegoating which lays blame on a wife for their husband’s sins against them.  Shirley Taylor describes many of them in her first book.  I’ll mention a few names that used to carry a great deal of respect.  Tim Keller was once chief among them for me but now offers what I find to be disturbingly strange writing about sex, what it should be, and what it should mean.  The Mahaneys, the Driscolls, the Wilsons, and pastors and their wives who I know in real life blame the wife for their husband’s sins.  I can't stomach documenting the numerous statements, but do a bit of googling, and they are sure to turn up.



“If your house were cleaner, he wouldn’t cheat.  If you gave him enough sex, he wouldn’t cheat.  If you hadn’t “let yourself go,” he wouldn’t cheat.  If he were satisfied in bed at home, he would never have put photographs of his genitalia online to find flings. Love him with ‘ooey gooey love’ and let love cover a multitude of sins’ by ignoring how he treats you.  Be his ‘on demand’ sex kitten.’  Be a whore in the bedroom and a saint in the kitchen.  If he still cheats, you aren’t trying hard enough.  You’re getting just what you deserve and just what you earned.”

A dear friend of mine has whispered this term in private, qualifying these teachings as “spread your legs theology.”  It sounds offensive, but with this filth that is promulgated in the name of the Christian Faith today, I don’t see it as that inaccurate. 

 [Late Note:  Shirley Taylor just gave me permission to identify her as the originator of the term, "spread your legs theology."]

 All a woman’s worth is based not in her self and her image that was created in the Image of God but in the anatomy between her legs — a receptacle for conquer through piercing and a baby machine which allows men to take dominion over the earth to redeem it.  Why would young men raised with this mindset see women as anything other than an object for their use and pleasure, bound to servile obedience in order to be acceptable to God?

A good part of the world watched the Duggar Family market the formula that promises the raising of perfect and wholesome kids.  I feel terrible for the Duggars for buying into the lie as I watch them pay the price for their moral disengagement — the illusion that obediently following Gothard’s plan makes them innocent of the fruit that the plan produces.  They had faith in its ability to make them impervious to the problems with which they now wrestle.  (Consider also that not all of the family’s problems have come to public light.)  I’m sure that in their shock, they will continue to stick by their commitment to the formula, and we will see the “spread your legs” element of it piled upon Anna.  

But is it for God’s glory or just as social proof to attest to the validity and the purity of the traditions of men?

The New Altar of Molech

Molech was an Ammonite deity who represented masculinity and the part that man played in reproduction to bring about life, and his consort was Ashtoreth, a female deity of fertility.  Canaanites, Philistines and other people in North Africa worshiped these deities and offered their first born children as live sacrifices to Molech.  Ashtoreth was worshiped through shrine prostitution and other ritualistic sex acts.  The altars of Molech were statutes made of brass and were heated from the inside, so that when children were placed in the arms of statute, they would burn alive and would then be engulfed by flame.  The parents then earned divine favor from Molech in exchange for their child’s life.

I think so often of this image when women within this modern religious movement must willingly bury their talents and their gifts and even their identity as fully human in the eyes of God.  They are said to be the indirect and derivative of man, so they are of lesser essence.  Their sole purpose is also lesser as they were created for man’s use.  They are told that they must sacrifice all to make their religious system work through servility which they must accept with grace and joy.  

Like the parents who took their firstborn children to the altar of burning brass as they stood as drums drowned out the voices of their child’s screams, women like Anna Duggar are called to crawl up on the altar of the traditions of men in an act of worship to an ideology that promises to save them.

Who do the Duggars really worship?  Is it the altar of a foolish consistency for their own brand, or has Bill Gothard’s version of truth completely eclipsed the simplicity of the Gospel?  How is this magical thinking not an example of “spread your legs theology” ?  How does any of it glorify God?

My Grief and Hope for Anna Duggar

How my heart aches for Anna and her children.  I cannot help but think of this image as I read about Josh’s continued actions.  I know well the way divorce — even divorce that is allowed in the Bible because of adultery — is vilified.  She was likely seen as the “cure” what would heal Josh of his sexual deviance. The theology that blames women for every sin back to the beginning of the Fall of Man, and like Eve, she has failed.  I know it what will happen.  I have seen it.  I have watched it destroy people and crush them.

I want to tell Anna to run from the brass arms of the idol that has been built in the name of a family because of the empty promises of a deluded, sick man who is also a sex abuser — Bill Gothard.  I want to protect her somehow from the burning that will be sold to her as the purifying of her soul as opposed to an unholy sacrifice to a cultic theology of fantasy.   I want to tell her to take her children and run as far as she can from the fire, but I doubt that she will.  She loves the ideal to which she has pledged her life.  As is true of any young wife, despite what has happened, I know that she loves her husband and the father of her children.  But I also know that she loves a fantasy that she’s been forced to accept.

I can pray.  I can write about how, from my perspective, she’s worshiping a hollow tradition that has made empty promises to her.  How I pray that when the burdens of that life to which she’s bound so tightly become too heavy that she will ask God to show her how her burdens can be made light and how her soul can find gentle rest in Him!  Perhaps then, she may somehow find her way to these words and will take them to heart, and the God of all comfort will reveal Himself to her in strength.  Deliver her, Lord — soon!  May it be sooner than I can imagine.
 
http://undermuchgrace.blogspot.com/2015/08/will-anna-duggar-be-offered-as-next.html?m=1

Christian conservatives push child marriage with creepy meme comparing girls to apples

VYCKIE GARRISON
ALTERNET
February 15,  2016
 
“Girls are like apples on trees. Their fathers are the farmers, whose job is to care for them. He must protect his apples from pests and disease. He must guard them against thieves who may pick his apples prematurely. Neither those at the top nor those at the bottom can help their location. But, when each reaches peak ripeness, it is the farmer’s job to harvest that fruit and give it to whom he will, to those in need. So there is nothing wrong with the apples still on the tree and nothing wrong with the boys who seek them. But it is the farmer’s duty to provide for both, in due season.”

Perhaps one of the most disturbing images on the Internet recently comes from the Christian fundamentalist website, “Let Them Marry.” Formerly called, “True Love Doesn’t Wait (It Marries)”, the pro-early marriage site is a Quiverfull ministry dedicated to teaching fathers the truly biblical path to marriage for their young sons and daughters.

The site’s main author, and patriarch extraordinaire, Vaughn Ohlman, believes Christian youth are not marrying early enough because Christian dads are way too picky about which “boys” they’re willing to give their “girls” to in marriage:

We believe that not only should most people marry, they should marry in their youth. The Bible speaks of the “wife of thy youth” (Prov. 5:18; Is. 54:6; Mal. 2:14-15) and “children of the youth” (Ps. 127:4). Scripture also speaks of not letting children pass the flower of their age (1 Cor. 7:36) … Leaving the physically mature young man struggling with fornication and leaving the physically mature young woman wallowing in fruitless, barren celibacy—these are both unscriptural and ungodly actions.

The onerous quote above, which likens daughters to apples and their fathers to farmers, is an apt representation of the creepy objectification of young girls and women by their own fathers which pervades the Christian purity movement. The message is clear: the value of a young woman is in her virginity — a consumable commodity owned by her future husband, kept in trust by Daddy.

Gross.

Vaughn Ohlman is a sick man with a twisted sense of fatherly love.

Suzanne Titkemeyer, administrator of the No Longer Quivering blog, frequently features the bizarre rantings of “Let Them Marry” in the “Quoting Quiverfull” section and has had numerous interactions with Vaughn, whom she describes as, “a nonsensical pain in the ass who refuses to accept logic, facts and legitimate figures,” reports that Ohlman was interested in a girl at his church and her daddy judged him not good enough and rejected him.

(That story is all kinds of messed up, but the good news is … whew, she dodged a bullet!)

Of the “girls are like apples” quote, Titkemeyer says, “Girls and women are NOT consumable objects without thoughts, feelings, humanity or needs.”

Cindy Kunsman, author of the Spiritual Abuse Survivors blog, Under Much Grace, says this comparison of girls to fruit falls short on several counts. “The words belie the writer, for they demonstrate the grandiosity of the patriarch who is cast as the farmer as well as the theme of the eldest head of household in this national folk religion. Everyone and everything derives its existence from the patriarchal, head-of-household farmer who seems to be entirely responsible and omnipotent over flora, fauna, and other adult men, too.”

Kunsman adds, “A good father loves and cares for his daughters and sees these apples of his eye as beloved people, not objects. This meme reduces girls (who are assumed to be daughters if not all women) to products for consumption and men the devourers. But even the suitors who desire them (because of nature, not the farmer’s nurture) are subject to bounded choice. It appears that young men procure apples to devour, but they are also subjects of the farmer. It’s amazing to me just how many dynamics of thought reform and spiritual abuse this homegrown meme illustrates in just a short narrative.”

“Girls are like apples on trees” … a nauseating idea, indeed. Sadly, it’s classic Quiverfull and no surprise coming from the hyper-patriarchal Christian culture which views women as property and children as commodities.

You can read our stories at No Longer Quivering. If you like Twitter drama, you can also follow me: @NoQuivering.

Vyckie Garrison was once a minor celebrity in the Quiverfull Movement, made famous by TV’s Duggar family. As a devout, Bible-believing Christian and the mother of seven homeschooled children, Garrison spent 16 years, with her husband, publishing a newspaper for families on a similar path. Today, via a website called No Longer Quivering, she publishes resources for women leaving the movement.

http://www.rawstory.com/2016/02/christian-conservatives-push-child-marriage-with-creepy-meme-comparing-girls-to-apples/