Showing posts with label ex-member. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ex-member. Show all posts

Dec 30, 2019

Watchtower Documents

Barbara Anderson
Barbara Anderson was a Jehovah’s Witness from 1954 to 1997. But while working as a researcher and writer at their worldwide headquarters from 1982 thru 1992, something went terribly wrong. Barbara uncovered a conflict that would derail her plans, and change her life forever. Her unique story shines a bright light on Watchtower/JW.ORG policies that not only protect sexual predators, but unduly influence members to believe policies and beliefs of Jehovah’s Witnesses are Bible-based and inspired from God. Barbara’s story also includes unprecedented commentary from Bonnie Zieman, M.Ed., psychotherapist, and author Jon Atack. Bonnie and Jon have written extensively about coercive control and report behind the scenes, while Barbara shares her story, of what was happening psychologically in her high-control world. Praise for Barbara Anderson Uncensored – Eyewitness to Deceit:Nothing short of awe-inspiring! Barbara’s valor in the face of an epic David versus Goliath battle to protect children against the policies of an international organization demonstrates how the efforts of one person, who stands up for right, truly can effect change.

– Mariuca Rofick This unique book, about a woman who has changed so many lives, will also give readers a rare peek behind the scenes of how policies and beliefs are formed at the world headquarters for Jehovah’s Witnesses.

– Mark O’Donnell I found myself spellbound reading Barbara’s story, which provides a unique perspective on how things work at Watchtower’s headquarters. Her time spent there as a researcher yielded some real nuggets regarding Watchtower’s history that were previously unknown, and expose how Watchtower white washes its history.

– Lee ElderI highly recommend reading Barbara Anderson’s book. It is a candid narrative of a worldwide religion, one that most people have seen as harmless until now. She also offers a workable plan of action for change. – Joanna Foreman

Barbara Anderson Uncensored: Eyewitness To Deceit

Aug 13, 2018

Jan 12, 2018

University Bible Fellowship (UBF): Press Releases of ex-members

Brian Karcher, an ex-member, published a book in 2015 that documents and explains how UBF operates. https://www.amazon.com/Identity-Snatchers-Exposing-Korean-Campus-ebook/dp/B014YT4ULC 

Here is a huge list compilation of press releases of UBF ex-members.

Tom Brown's story got feature in Ronald Enroth's book called Churches that Abuse:

Jon Berryman's story on a newspaper press release:http://ubfriends.net/regarding-city-evangelism-church-chicago-ubf-chapter/

A blog of newspaper press releases on Winnipeg UBF that were made in the 1980's and early 1990s: https://winnipegubf.blogspot.com/

John Wick's story on two newspaper press releases in the early 1990s. (Sidenote: he is current a counselor at the Wellsprings Retreat and Resource Center.):http://ubfriends.net/columbus-ubf-man-says-he-was-deceived-into-joining-religious-cult/

In 1997 there was a TV broadcast on Triton UBF (in Chicago): http://ubfriends.net/trition-ubf-teddy-hembekides-secret/

In 2000 and 2001 there were several media reports on Korea UBF documenting a major split in the organization:








In the early 2000's and 2010's there were several media reports on Bonn UBF (in Germany)






In 2003 there was a media report  by request of Amy Young, an ex-member: https://wwrn.org/articles/4579/

In 2005 there were two media reports. One in Columbus, Ohio and the other in Toledo Ohio:



Press release documents of Cologne/Koln UBF (in Germany in the late 80s early 90s: http://www.ezw-berlin.de/html/suche.php?query=ubf&cat=Publikationen

There is one newspaper clip in the 1980s on Bon UBF (in Germany): http://ubfriends.net/bonn-ubf-studentenwerk-bonn-warnete-vor-ubf-original-german/

In 2016 there was a press release on Canada UBF in Victoria, Canada:http://www.martlet.ca/student-club-connected-to-an-organization-accused-of-cult-like-activities/

Ever had this dream where you scream but no voice comes out?

Ever had this dream where you scream but no voice comes out?
To make a long story short -
I can finally admit to myself - I was a cult member.
I feel so stupid, it took me 20 years to realize that.
For the last 2 years, I've been in the process of healing from the dreadful outcomes of being in a cult for 20 years.
As in most respectful cults, changing your name (for spiritual reasons of course) is optional, and inevitable...
Just before 2018 begins, I want to get back to my original name, Ofer.
It's the beautiful name my parents gave me at birth.
My cult of choice? oh, it was kabala center
(The rav used to say - it doesn't matter what they write about us, as long as they spell our name right...)
If you, the reader, are still a part of the kabala center, that first line I wrote is for you.
There's almost no chance you will understand what I am talking about, but I will say it anyway (you know, "he who saves one soul, it is as if he saved the entire world").
I plan to continue my healing-process journey by sharing my experiences and insights.
2018, it's going to be fun!
Stay tuned,
Ofer Shaal
Translation to Hebrew:האם אי פעם חלמת את החלום הזה שבו אתה צועק אבל שום קול לא יוצא?
תקציר הסיפור -
סוף סוף אני מצליח להודות בזה - הייתי חבר כת.
אני מרגיש כזה טיפש, לקח לי 20 שנה להבין את זה.
בשנתיים האחרונות, אני בתהליך של ריפוי מן התוצאות הנוראות של להיות בכת במשך 20 שנה.
כמו ברוב הכתות שמכבדות את עצמן, שינוי השם (מסיבות רוחניות כמובן) הוא אופציונלי, אך בלתי נמנע...
אבל לפני ששנת 2018 מתחילה, אני רוצה לחזור לשמי המקורי, עופר.
זה השם היפה שהוריי נתנו לי בלידה.
הכת שבחרתי? אה, זה היה מרכז הקבלה
(הרב נהג לומר - זה לא משנה מה כותבים עלינו, כל עוד הם מאייתים את השם שלנו נכון...)
אם אתה, הקורא, עדיין חלק ממרכז הקבלה, השורה הראשונה שכתבתי היא בשבילך.
אין כמעט סיכוי שתבין על מה אני מדבר, אבל אני אומר את זה בכל מקרה (ככתוב, "כל המציל נפש אחת כאילו הציל עולם ומלואו").
אני מתכנן להמשיך את תהליך הריפוי שלי על ידי שיתוף בחוויות ובתובנות שלי.
2018, זה הולך להיות כיף!
עדכונים בהמשך,
עופר שעל

Sep 12, 2017

Hare Krishna is bad for your Mental Health

Anke Holst

I spontaneously gave this lecture to a friend over dinner recently, and decided it was something I wanted to share with a bigger audience.

This is all part of me going through the process of becoming comfortable with speaking to camera as well. 

Here is a link to a series of lectures by one of their swamis that will illustrate what I talk about.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2EUQhaCHMHc

A Recovering Monk - Digesting My Extended Adolescence

Nitai Joseph
Nitai Joseph
A Recovering Monk - Digesting My Extended Adolescence - Nitai Joseph

Recently, due to this newly released documentary and website created by a second-generation Hare Krishna member, the subject of widespread child abuse within the International Society for Krishna Consciousness (ISKCON) has been reignited on social media. After seeing some express bewilderment as to how these kinds of abuses can go on within a spiritual community, I’ve decided to offer my analysis on the subject. In doing so, I’ve found a lot of confirmation and insight in Esther Rockett’s blog post titled “Cultivating Sexual Abuse in Religious Communities“, which is in turn based heavily on the work of Father Tom Doyle. 

One reason these recent releases are stirring up discussion is because they show that despite ISKCON’s desire to present child abuse as a (well-documented) stain of the past, the problems continue, although they do seem to be less widespread. 

Please note that of course not all of the components in the following analysis are present in all places or at all times, but they are absolutely not anomalous, either. In fact, many of them stem from core tenets of Gaudiya Vaishnava doctrine and how ISKCON has instituted those tenets from its inception in the 1960s. While I set out to write this solely as an analysis of behaviors and attitudes, I found it impossible to separate those from the theological and philosophical stances of the tradition. For those who can’t understand the framework that has made ISKCON and others such a fertile place for abuse, I offer the following: CONTINUE READING

http://arecoveringmonk.com/

Hare Krishna Thing

Hare Krishna Thing
Hare Krishna Thing


So, you’re thinking about giving this Hare Krishna Thing a try?

Perhaps you got a book or visited a temple, it doesn’t matter — before you give it a try, please listen to us first. We’ve been there and done that. And there are plenty of things we strongly feel are so intrinsically damaging to your well-being, to the very sense of who you are, that we’re obliged to warn you by providing you with as much information as possible.

We’re not armchair anti-cultists. We’re normal people from all walks of life who actually did the Hare Krishna Thing. But those days are over. We’ve spent years, in some cases decades, embroiled in the daily ups-and-downs and ins-and-outs of the Hare Krishna Thing. Then we spent several more years wresting ourselves free.

We’re no longer part of it because we know what that Hare Krishna Thing is really all about.

We’d like you to know, too.

This sites is intended to get you up to speed. They outline the cult’s beliefs and practices and give a sense of the issues – personal, social, philosophical – you can expect to contend with as a Hare Krishna follower.

http://harekrishnathing.com/

A Personal Message for Anyone Thinking About Getting Involved In Krishna Consciousness -Steven Gelberg

Steven Gelberg
Steven Gelberg
"Guided by the principle that one should move through life with open eyes and some degree of self-awareness, and that one should share the fruits of one's insights and intuitions, I would like to pass on some useful information to anyone who might be getting involved in the Krishna movement. I myself was a loyal, dedicated, and influential devotee for many years, and have had many years since to reflect on and make sense of my experiences. It's my hope that what I write here will help bring some clarity to your spiritual quest. (I'll say a few more words about myself at the end.)"

"First, please know that I respect and honor anyone who is fed up with the conventional, material world and seeks a meaningful alternative—some kind of life with more truth, wisdom, sanity, ecstasy. The problem is, sincere seeking in and of itself does not guarantee finding one's true path or reaching the ultimate goal. Making a major decision about what direction to take depends on having a clear sense of what the options are, what's actually out there in the spiritual marketplace. Some guides are helpful, others aren't. Many have mixed motives and hidden agendas. At the very least, then, gather enough information so that you have some sense of where you're going, what you're getting yourself into. Otherwise, it's easy to become waylaid by questionable teachers and disciples competing for converts. "

"What I'm going to present here is an accurate, unbiased, straightforward description of some of the things you'll be expected to believe and do as an active member of ISKCON. If a Krishna person tells you that any of these points are incorrect or untrue, he or she is probably not being honest. It's natural that members will want to explain Krishna consciousness to you in as positive and attractive a way as possible, which is certainly what I did when I was there. Here, however, what you will read is the simple, unadorned truth, boiled down to its fine (if rather blunt) essence. I affirm that everything I present here is true and accurate, though admittedly stated with a certain directness that you won't get from active, committed members trying to make a good impression on a potential new recruit. I have no other motive in this than to share what I know to be the truth on some important matters, and possibly (hopefully) save some people a lot of time and trouble."

Betrayal of the Spirit: My Life behind the Headlines of the Hare Krishna Movement

Betrayal of the Spirit: My Life behind the Headlines of the Hare Krishna Movement
by Nori J. Muster 

"A delightfully written narrative tapestry."
- Dr. Larry Shinn 




Synopsis a chapter-by-chapter summary of the book. 

Book Reviews Publisher's Weekly, Yoga Journal, and more. 

Excerpt from Chapter Eight, "Who's Watching the Children." 

Amazon.com excerpt click book cover for "Look Inside" preview. 

Amazon.com interview published when Betrayal of the Spirit came out. 

Category Best Seller award from Amazon.com. 

The Betrayal Files documentation for Betrayal of the Spirit.

Krishna Cult Awareness Foundation

Gaura Rader
Gaura Rader has a BS.C. in psychology and an M.A. in philosophy from the University of Florida. He was born in a Krishna cult and went to Krishna cult boarding schools and private schools until he started college. When he was eighteen he joined the Krishna cult he was born by deciding to dedicate his life to God and become lifelong celibate monk. He spent approximately ten years as a member of a Krishna cult. He currently teaches ethics at Hocking College and is working on completing a Ph.D. in social psychology. His research is focused on the psychological foundations of morality. He is the author fo the upcoming (2016) book The God Question: What should we believe about God, science, religion, and morality? He blogs at http://krishnacult.com/.

Krishna Cult Awareness Foundation is a project whose goal is to provide information about Krishna cults to non-members who are considering joining and to help current and former members transition out of the cult.

Over the years a number of people have left Krishna cults and detailed their experiences (Steven J. Gelberg, Nori Muster, Willem Vanderberg) and there are a number of people contributing to the conversation about Krishna cults on various blogs and youtube channels.

Krishna Cult Awareness Foundation seeks to facilitate the evolution and the anti-Krishna cult movement by being a comprehensive resource for those, whether individuals or members of institutions) looking to know more about Krishna cults and how they function. And an online community (Like the Facebook page!!!) for those that have been a part of and left Krishna cults.

If you’d like to get involved in the project in any way email Gaura at gaurarader@gmail.com.


Jun 3, 2017

John Hoyt's Journey from Male Supermodel to Cult Member

John Hoyt
John Hoyt
The Main Line native discusses his shockingly unconventional path.
MICHAEL BRADLEY 
Mainline Today
May 30, 2017

The golden hair has thinned and those vivid blue eyes have dimmed a shade or two, but it’s hard to imagine anything could happen to John Hoyt’s jawline, made up of two I-beams connected at the chin by a ball-peen hammer’s divot. Sitting at the bar at Casey’s Pour House in Berwyn on a frosty afternoon before New Year’s, watching meaningless college football bowl games and enjoying a few beers, Hoyt looks like he could easily jet to Milan, stride into a studio and command the lens, just as he did 25 years ago.

Back then, Hoyt claimed the title of “First Male Supermodel” under the name Hoyt Richards (his middle name is Richards). He did things like serve as the delighted sandwich meat between Christy Turlington and Naomi Campbell on the New York party scene.

But Hoyt doesn’t do that anymore. He’s more interested in filmmaking and the occasional acting gig. More than anything else, though, he wants to use his art to help others who’ve endured what he has—and tell the world that, just because you spend almost 20 years in a cult and bestow $4.5 million of your earnings upon its membership, you aren’t some simple-minded person capable of being brainwashed by anyone with a Manhattan apartment and a wild story about intergalactic reincarnation. “I’ll never be boring at cocktail parties,” says Hoyt with a laugh.

You want stories? Hoyt has them. Some are incredible, like how a kid from Princeton turned down an offer—and a fat payday—to fly to Europe for a photo shoot because he had an econ exam that day. But not all of them are upbeat—like the mental image of Hoyt having his head shaved by angry Eternal Values cult members tired of his preferred status. A bit more amusing, perhaps, is how Fabio helped him escape.

It’s tough to listen as Hoyt talks about recovering some sanity and esteem after being berated for hours by EV acolytes about his unworthiness. He speaks willingly about his time in Eternal Values, his struggle to regain his life after leaving, and how important it is for him now to help others heal from similar experiences.

Hoyt’s smile is ready, and his wit is more than just a defense mechanism. He’s reached a point in his life where his time in Eternal Values no longer defines him. He may look pretty much the same on the outside, but Hoyt has changed on the inside.

“It’s been a hard process,” says Hoyt’s older sibling, Rory. “He’s grown a lot and matured. He left Eternal Values when he was 37, and he was still 20 in terms of his maturity. Now, he seems like a regular 54-year-old.”

Rory has seen his brother do a lot of growing in a short time. “And it’s taken a lot of personal effort on his part,” says Rory. “Part of it has been looking in, and part of it has been looking out and saying, ‘What can I do to help people avoid this?’”

That’s the story now. Hoyt is working on a documentary about the ordeal, plus a book he’s writing with a former EV member. Hoyt once looked at Eternal Values founder Frederick von Mierers as a spiritual talisman of sorts, capable of opening fascinating worlds to a young man whose life to that point had been pretty much out of the “Preppy Handbook.” He wasn’t stupid—Hoyt holds diplomas from the Haverford School and Princeton—but he was vulnerable. As a result, what started as fun and games became a sad story of manipulation, humiliation and regret.

“When I was in that situation, I thought, ‘Nothing like this could ever happen,’” Hoyt says. “That was my greatest vulnerability. It started simply, and as I got further and further into it and it got cultier and cultier, the thing I said was: ‘This isn’t a cult. It can’t happen to me.’ Mind control works on everybody.”

John Hoyt didn’t want to go to the Haverford School. He was perfectly happy at Conestoga High School, where he was at the top of his class. But after his sophomore year, his mom insisted he make the switch.
Hoyt was 2 when his family moved to Berwyn from Fayetteville, N.Y., a village of about 4,300 just east of Syracuse, in 1964. He was the fourth of six
children—four boys, two girls—raised by Bob and Terry. His mother’s reasoning for the change in school was based on the success Hoyt’s brother Rory had at Haverford, where he tightened up his academics and gained admittance to Princeton. “Rory was a notorious procrastinator and was struggling in public school, while I was succeeding,” Hoyt says. “When Rory went to Haverford for his senior year and got into Princeton, my mother said, ‘That’s the solution.’ I said, ‘No.’”

It didn’t matter. He started at Haverford in the fall of 1978—but at least he got the chance to play football, something he hadn’t been allowed to do while he was at Conestoga. Preseason practices introduced him to a group of guys who would help facilitate a soft landing. During his two years at Haverford, Hoyt played fullback under the late Mike Cunningham and ran track in the winter and spring seasons, standing out particularly in the hurdles. “He was an athletic, Adonis-looking guy who had dropped out of nowhere into the school,” says Mark Mayock, who graduated from Haverford in 1980 with Hoyt. “There were only about 80 guys in our class, and there was a little bit of assimilation. But the nice thing was that he could start right away in football and at least know the guys on the team before he got into classes.”

Hoyt’s school situation may not have been his ideal, but his summers were idyllic. His family spent long stretches in Nantucket, where he would join siblings, cousins and friends in typical seaside adventures at Nobadeer Beach. “We called it ‘No Brassiere Beach,’” Hoyt says.

It was there, when he was 16, that Hoyt first encountered Frederick von Mierers. “Nantucket is not where you think you’re going to meet a cult leader,” Hoyt says.

Von Mierers was a charismatic type, with blond hair and striking good looks. He spoke about ancient cultures and astrology, topics that interested Hoyt and ones he didn’t generally discuss with those close to him. Hoyt and his friends attended von Mierers’ parties, looking to get free beer. “I thought I was working him and taking advantage of him,” says Hoyt, not understanding at the time that von Mierers was actually working him.

After graduation and a year at Haileybury boarding school outside of London, Hoyt began at Princeton, where he majored in economics and played football. Being in Central Jersey gave him greater access to von Mierers, who had an apartment in Manhattan and was a fixture on the New York social scene. Hoyt and his friends would head north for parties, again thinking they were fortunate to have such a connected patron. “I thought it was awesome,” Hoyt says. “I saw Truman Capote and Andy Warhol.”

During a stretch after his sophomore year, Hoyt lived rent free in von Mierers’ apartment, where he met a Brooks Brothers designer who encouraged him to consider modeling. It was an awful lot for a college student, although Hoyt didn’t suspect anything untoward. “We shared spiritual values, but we were also having a good old time,” he says. “I was experiencing life, and it seemed innocuous at the time.”

About those “shared” spiritual values: Von Mierers said he was from the star Arcturus, which is in the constellation Boötes and is located 36.7 light-years from the sun. According to the cult leader, Arcturus is the “spiritual center of the universe,” and it was there that the members of Eternal Values—in a previous incarnation—had gained the necessary knowledge to save planet Earth from the coming apocalypse.

As Hoyt heard more about Arcturus and met those who’d come back from the star, he felt a desire to join them in their quest to preserve the planet. For almost seven years, von Mierers had given Hoyt the soft sell, enticing him with parties, lodging and friendship. In 1985, having just graduated from Princeton and at the genesis of what would become a remarkably successful modeling career, Hoyt was ready for more.

Von Mierers had built steadily to a crescendo. When he met the teenaged Hoyt on the beach, he didn’t lead with the post-apocalyptic tale. He worked up to it. “I wanted to be on the inside of the club,” Hoyt says. “Everybody else was Arcturian. What about me? For me, [von Mierers’ Arcturus story] wasn’t far-fetched. How far-fetched is it that someone can walk on water?”

As Hoyt has learned more about the psychology of cults, he has come to understand that their main manipulative tool is eroding people’s ability to think critically. Once the information is introduced, “recruits” become intent on learning more. After a period of indoctrination, any instinct to question the story or those telling it is looked at as a lack of faith and a stepping away from the group that has become their primary social network.

Hoyt’s move toward the Eternal Values world took him further from his friends and family. Mayock says he and his Haverford classmates didn’t see Hoyt much, if at all, after they finished school there. Mayock taught at Haverford from 1985 to 1988, and during that time, Hoyt’s younger brother, Garth, graduated from the school. “I was talking to [Garth] at graduation and asked him about John and how he was doing,” Mayock says. “[Garth] said, ‘He’s a little unreachable these days. I’d love him to be here today, but I haven’t seen him in a while.’”

The rest of the Hoyts didn’t see too much of John, either. By that time, he’d become Hoyt Richards, the star of the Ford Modeling Agency and a sensation in fashion capitals across the globe. His family referred to the other members of Eternal Values as Hoyt’s “friends from New York,” but didn’t look at EV as a cult. Just as Hoyt was dissociating himself from his friends, he wasn’t visiting his family.

Part of it was the job. Hoyt was spending time all over the place, filming commercials, doing photo shoots, and enjoying the spotlight. But when he wasn’t working, he was with von Mierers and the other cult members.

In 1990, Vanity Fair ran an article that exposed Eternal Values. As one might expect, von Mierers and the members—including Hoyt—denied this vehemently. While they were performing damage control, Hoyt’s family and friends were getting an education. “We came to the stark realization that the group of friends he had been talking about was really a cult,” Rory says. “It was dangerous, and he was into bad stuff. We thought that John was a victim of all of this and he didn’t know it.”

Not long after the article ran, Rory, cousin Stephen Williams and Nick Donatiello, a friend of both Rory and John’s from Princeton, visited Hoyt in Newport, R.I., to stage an intervention. Donatiello had called Steven Hassan, a former Moonie who had become one of America’s foremost authorities on cults, to talk about some techniques that might be successful. Hassan recommended consulting an “exit counselor,” someone trained in helping people escape cults. They prepared carefully for the confrontation, but despite their efforts and concern, the intervention failed. “Because it was unsuccessful at the time, a door slammed,” Rory says. “We had one shot. All his friends in the group had vilified his family and friends. They told him, ‘These people tried to take you away. We’re your friends.’”

Later in 1990, when von Mierers died of AIDS-related causes, Eternal Values continued on, albeit without the same philosophical bent. Members relocated to a house in North Carolina, and as the ’90s moved forward, EV’s personality became a little edgier. In 1999, the other members thought Hoyt was losing enthusiasm for the cult, and they became nasty. “They needed to indoctrinate me more,” Hoyt says. “I needed to spend more time with them.”

They shaved his head so he couldn’t model and made him perform demeaning household chores. “My nickname was Dipshit,” Hoyt recalls.

When the members were in better moods, they’d call him “Dippy.” But those moments weren’t too common.

Often, the other members would spend hours berating Hoyt. He was no good; he was stupid. “My brain was put into a high-stress environment, and my fight-or-flight instinct was triggered,” Hoyt says. “Once I was off the hot seat, I had a couple hours to decompress and let the adrenaline drain out of my brain.”

After nine weeks of this treatment, Hoyt came to the conclusion that the hazing wasn’t going to end. Instead of being angry at his fellow cult members, he felt shame, believing he was unworthy of them and that his leaving would allow them to move forward.

It took three tries, but he finally escaped. He was bald, with two or three thousand dollars on a credit card and nowhere to go. Then he remembered that his buddy Fabio had said he could crash with him anytime he wanted. So, he went west. “It was the perfect place for me to decompress and go through the post-traumatic stress phase,” Hoyt says.

The healing had begun. But it wouldn’t be easy.

Combine John Hoyt’s Princeton degree and Kim Wong Keltner’s graduation from Cal-Berkeley in three-and-a-half years, and you have two pretty smart people. So how in the world did they both end up in a cult? That’s the question Keltner is trying to answer as she works with Hoyt on a book about their Eternal Values experiences.

Keltner met von Mierers in the mid-1980s, when she was a high school freshman, and spent a good amount of time in Manhattan with the Eternal Values group—though she told her parents she was visiting friends in Lake Tahoe. A student at an exclusive prep school in Northern California, Keltner was dealing with the expectations of her extremely demanding “tiger mom,” for whom any grade less than an A was not tolerated. “An A-minus is the Chinese F,” says Keltner, an accomplished author whose most recent book, Tiger Babies Strike Back, is a response to the strict parenting of Chinese-American tiger moms.

During the few years she was associated with EV, Keltner got to know Hoyt. She sent him a Facebook message a couple of years ago, hoping to reconnect and find some answers. How did it all happen? The title of their new book, Do You Remember Me?, refers to the first line of her message
to Hoyt.

“If I can use the access I have to help somebody who feels stupid for falling for [a cult’s methods], that’s great,” Keltner says. “What led us to Eternal Values was a camaraderie and the belief that we could do good. That’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Hoyt is doing more than just working on the book. He’s produced a documentary, tentatively titled Who Is Hoyt Richards?. He calls it a “cautionary tale” and hopes it will show people how to “make life work” after such a harrowing cult experience. Hoyt would like to take it to the Venice Film
Festival in September, and then Toronto. His production company, Tortoise Entertainment, has had some movies make it to festivals before. Ultimately, he hopes to see the final product on HBO or as a Netflix Original.

It’s all part of his healing process. Hoyt says he’s become “fascinated with telling stories,” but he doesn’t limit his work to being behind the camera. He coaches actors and writers and also does some acting of his own. Mostly, he’s looking to live a happy and full life in West Hollywood.

Hoyt has reached out to other EV members and counseled people who’ve been in cults. In 2015, when Islamic extremists bombed targets in Paris, Hoyt went on Dr. Drew to discuss how people are indoctrinated into groups like ISIS. It’s important to him to share his experiences with others. “John is so transparent and willing to talk about any aspect of the group,” Keltner says. “It made me feel safe to talk.”

The most important work Hoyt has done in his recovery is with his family. After the intervention attempt, Hoyt “hated” Rory and didn’t want to have any contact with him. Once he left Eternal Values, he went about the business of rebuilding his relationships with all involved.

In 2003, Hoyt spent several months caring for his mother, who was dying of cancer. He has since become close again with Rory, who describes Hoyt as “the fun uncle” to his four children. He spends summers on Nantucket with his family and enjoys being part of their lives. “After I got out of Eternal Values, I developed such a love and admiration for Rory, because he was willing to [attempt the intervention],” Hoyt says.

The time is right for Hoyt to tell his story. He might still look a lot like he did at his modeling peak, but inside he’s so much more.

“I’m hoping all of my information helps people make choices that are healthier for them,” he says. “If this hadn’t gone down, I wouldn’t be doing the work I am today. It’s the most rewarding work I’ve done.”

http://www.mainlinetoday.com/Main-Line-Today/June-2017/John-Hoyts-Journey-from-Male-Modeldom-to-a-Cult/

Mar 15, 2017

From Survivor to Thriver

Angela “Vennie” Kocsis
Angela “Vennie” Kocsis
ICSA Today, Vol. 5, No. 3, 2014, 22-29
By Angela “Vennie” Kocsis

The Move of God, which is also known as The Move, was founded by a former Baptist preacher in the 1960s in Florida. During his ministry, Sam Fife was a charismatic leader. It was a time of unrest in the country, with seething racial tensions and an increasingly unpopular Vietnam War. Sam seemed able to offer a sense of security, a place to belong, for people across the United States and Canada, and eventually in other countries around the world.

The basis of Sam Fife’s doctrine was that God had set some individuals inside the church system, first as apostles, then as prophets, and after that in a three-fold ministry. This configuration made up what Sam called the five-fold ministry that he taught would one day govern the world under God’s direction (Sam Fife’s sermon, God’s School of Divine Government, is available in its entirety at http://www.ima.cc/godsschool.php).

In the late ’60s and early ’70s, Sam began to gather his followers into the wilderness to prepare for this transition and end of the world. In a matter of just a few years, Fife’s followers had moved onto farms in Alaska, Canada, and South America. Sporting a large array of military equipment from Quonset huts to military cots, beds, and ham radios, Fife’s followers utilized his methods to build an empire. By 1974, the movement was boasting up to 40,000 followers from all walks of life.

When Sam Fife died in a plane crash in 1979, Move Elders, primarily led by C. E. Buddy Cobb, took over his ministry. Today, The Move of God exists in the form of nonprofit organizations and churches scattered across the world. They still have a strong following and still teach the same doctrines passed on by Sam Fife (see http://www.ima.cc/messages.php).

Although The Move still has supporters, several hundred people have participated in a Yahoo group in which they have written thousands of messages detailing their experiences (https://groups.yahoo.com/neo/groups/sam_fife/info). Supporters relay positive experiences; many child survivors, along with some adults who left on their own, describe a more sinister scene.

My Story

I was only 3 years old, but my siblings, 7 and 9 at the time, and my father have clear memories of how my mother was drawn into The Move of God in the early 1970s, and how that led my parents’ marriage to dissolve. While my father was locked down at the military base near San Diego, California working, one of The Move of God’s religious recruiters was diligently flattering my mother, who was busy trying to raise three children while her husband was absent. The more my father had to be gone, the more The Move of God recruiters were able to get their clutches into my mother, even convincing her that my father was actually not working, but most likely spending time with other women. They filled my mother’s head with so much confusion and question in regard to her own marriage that soon she was giving my father the ultimatum of either joining The Move of God or getting a divorce. My father refused to join The Move, trying to get my mother to somehow see reason.

My mother put my father through a brutal divorce, taking what she could until she had depleted his financial ability to continue fighting her in court for custody or even visitation of my siblings and me. The Move of God funded all of my mother’s court costs, including flying in my uncle all the way from the South to be a character witness on behalf of my mother. My father never stood a chance to gain custody of us. It felt that, in the blink of an eye, my mother, funded by The Move, had packed our lives into a U-Haul headed to Ware, Massachusetts. We children would not have a relationship with our father until we all became adults. My mother convinced us throughout our young lives that he did not want us and was an evil man.

The compound at Ware was classified as a deliverance farm. Sam Fife taught that all negative behaviors, including pedophilia, were a product of possession by demons. Sam’s doctrine included the belief that medical conditions, such as seizures, were the body being possessed by demons. We were specifically sent to this farm because my mother was overweight, my older brother was considered to have behavioral problems, and I was loud. My sister tended to be more on the quiet side, both trying to protect me and to stay out of anyone’s attention. My loudness was the result of my being completely deaf in my right ear, something that would never be brought up while I was living in this cult. Instead, I would be punished often for being too loud. The act of sending us to a deliverance farm, according to Sam Fife’s doctrines, would allow our family to get the necessary treatment to rid my mother of the demons of gluttony that were making her fat. It would also help rid us children of our demons, whatever the ministry decided they were.

I spent my years from 1973 to 1977 at Ware, until I turned 7. Upon arrival at Ware, our family was split up and put into classification units. I was put with other children my age. Everything from our former life was sorted through, from the back of the U-Haul truck. Anything that could be used for the commune was put into a community clothing bank, and the rest of our belongings, including all of our baby photos and mementos of childhood, were burned in a bonfire. The ministry taught that this process served to rid us of our life before the cult, erasing all memories we might have of it. The process would allow our minds to be emptied of the demonology of the secular world outside and refilled with Sam Fife’s doctrines of purification for God.

My time at Ware was filled with torture and humiliation. I was subjected to demon-casting-out rituals while tied to chairs and beaten, and to severe discipline, which included but was not limited to hypothermia baths, sleep deprivation, beatings with belts and paddles, public humiliation, and withholding of food. I also experienced sexual abuse through grooming, petting, fondling, and eventually penetration.

In 1977, our family was brought together, and we were flown up to a compound in Alaska. In Alaska the sexual abuse continued, as The Move of God still created a safe haven for pedophiles, its leaders believing they could deliver the demon of pedophilia out of a person. I, along with other children, still experienced child labor, withholding of food as discipline, and severe mental and physical abuse. Although elders and their children seemed somewhat protected from the treatment I endured, I have learned from survivors that some elder’s children were not impervious to abuse within their family unit.

Armed men monitored the compound 24 hours a day, and we were held to strict rules. For example, females were allowed to wear only skirts, and members needed elders’ permission to work certain jobs or marry. We were put through execution training because The Move taught that the Communists would eventually take over the United States and kill the Christians.

My mother, sister, and I were excommunicated from the cult when I was 14. My sister was a teenager who was seduced by a man in his early 40s. She was made to stand in front of the entire congregation and say that she was the one who seduced him. The elders made the decision that our family must be required to leave the cult, citing as their reason that my sister was an “untreatable harlot” and a threat to the sanctity of the other teenagers there. We moved to Martin, Tennessee, where my grandmother lived. The compound we left still exists today, miles off of the highway, near Delta Junction, Alaska. Some call it Dry Creek, the Land or Living Word Ministries.

Surviving

Life in society outside The Move of God was severe culture shock for me. My mother kept on living as though none of what we experienced had ever happened. Instead, we moved through life wearing a mask of functionality over severe dysfunction such as alcoholism, drug use, and intrafamily hatred and lashing out. Not only was I unfamiliar with the culture of my peers, but I also faced severe poverty because The Move sent us away with nothing but the clothes on our back and very few belongings.

I was a chameleon, watching and learning as I moved through my high-school years. Struggling to fit in socially, I joined a band in an attempt to feel part of a group and ended up turning to drug use and partying, trying to numb a pain that I didn’t yet have the skill to identify. I simply knew it existed inside of me like a dark hole.

When I turned 20, I became pregnant. Becoming a mother changed my focus considerably, and I began to study fine arts at the local university. But then I entered a relationship in college and migrated to the Pacific Northwest, where I gave birth to my second child. Still, I ended up wandering. My relationship failed, my family fell apart, and I found myself a single mother. I poured my attention into my children as much as possible, avoiding the inevitable collapse from the trauma I was carrying. My weight ballooned. I became physically ill. I shut down outwardly and became hardened.

Through these years I could not critically think through any of my experiences. Still, I spent much of my time writing poetry and trying to figure out the excruciating emotional and physical pain I was carrying.
Thriving

After my mother passed away in 2007, I decided that I was going to write about my life in the form of a novel. I had been trying to understand myself for years. I felt that using a character outside of myself would allow me the perspective to tell my story. So I began to write Cult Child through the eyes of a little girl named Sila Caprin.

I naively believed that I would fly through this story, tell it, and be done, and I set a deadline of a year to finish the novel. Instead, it would be 7 long years of traveling into me, and I could not have predicted what would emerge. I suffered from deep night terrors, dreams that I could not speak of for days, and I was unable even to turn on the light in a room. I lost my job. I started to understand that I was going to have to travel deeply back into the trauma in order to write the book. It was not going to be an easy ride. I avoided. I wept. I wrote an album of songs and lullabies for Sila as we travelled together into the dark recesses of the torture I had experienced.

Poetry, art, writing, and music have been my savior. As a child I was disallowed a voice, an identity, or any forms of authenticity because artistic endeavors were stifled. In adulthood, creativity became my rite of passage. I began to embrace my gifts and flourish artistically. Through my creativity I was able to take my pain and create a blueprint through which I could study the intricate details of my traumatic experiences.

A major change came when I discovered the power of my gratitude. When I was able to remember the things in my life I could be thankful for, the pain didn’t hurt as badly. I wasn’t sure exactly how to utilize this tool in my life, so I created a sensory system by which I could explore gratitude using my five senses. I later used this system to create and publish an interactive journal, Becoming Gratitude.

Most of my recovery from cult thinking I have accomplished on my own, knowing that there is much more for me to learn and understand about my experiences. The Internet allowed me to find more information about how my experiences had resulted in certain behaviors. I eventually found a counselor who helped me define my experiences, giving me a language by which I could communicate what was happening in my head, the way I viewed the world, and why.

The journey from being a cult survivor to thriving and being joyful was long and required active work on my part. I filled my living space with kind sayings toward myself, written on sticky notes in multiple colors, and reminding me that my past experiences did not have to define who I am today. Now I let the pain out, feel, accept my own vulnerability, and tell my story without shame. I believe creative therapy can reunite us with our authentic uniqueness and purpose. As a second-generation cult survivor, I find deep joy in sharing creative outlets with others who have experienced trauma.

About the Author

Angela “Vennie” Kocsis is an author, poet, painter, and songwriter residing in the Pacific Northwest. She is the author of Dusted Shelves: memoir of a cult child, a collection of poetic expressions of her cult experiences and their aftermath. This book is available in paperback, ebook, and audio-book formats. She is also the author of Becoming Gratitude, an interactive daily journaling system designed to explore gratitude using the senses. Her debut novel, Cult Child, recounts her life growing up in Sam Fife’s Move of God. She is currently working on the sequel to Cult Child and also recording a music CD. Vennie continues to create art and support survivors of cult trauma. Her art and poetry were represented in the 2014 Phoenix Project art exhibit and literary reading at ICSA’s 2014 Annual Conference in Washington, DC. Her work can be explored in depth at http://venniekocsis.com

http://www.icsahome.com/articles/from-survivor-to-thriver

Dec 16, 2016

Experience: I was abandoned by my cult

Christine and Jorg Mathis at their home in Wiltshire
There are parts of that day I was left on the roadside that I cannot recall

Christine Mathis with her husband Jörg: ‘We pieced together how the brotherhood had prevented us from marrying.’



Christine Mathis
Guardian
December 16, 2016

All I remember of the day I was left on a roadside in Pennsylvania, in 1963, was a hand pulling $20 from his pocket, and my small suitcase. I can’t remember who drove me away from the Bruderhof church community I had been shut in since I was a five-year-old girl; now, aged 24, I had been excluded. I was abandoned, but I could breathe again.

My Methodist parents had packed up our Gloucestershire home in 1943 and moved us to a two-room cottage, without hot water or a toilet, in Shropshire. Daddy used to deliver grain from his mill to the Cotswolds Bruderhof – a Christian movement originating in Germany. He was a pacifist and liked this international community of Christians all living together in wartime; eventually he persuaded my mother to join them.

I watched, confused, as two men with beards (“the brothers”) put my mattress on the back of a truck, packed up my beautiful dolls’ house to give away and took us to the closed religious commune. Its men and women, in their matching dress, felt like giants and witches to me. I became extremely insecure.

The church was dogmatic and fanatical. Its members did not use birth control and our family grew from three children to 12. I felt our parents had been brainwashed. They still loved us, but they withdrew; it was as if we children had become the property of the brotherhood.

When I was 14, we were sent to a commune in the jungle in Paraguay, where we lived, alongside other families, in a simple home with a straw roof and clay floor. When I turned 15, I worked all day in the kindergarten and was schooled in the evening. The heat and way of life were oppressive. I suffered panic attacks.

There was one happiness, though: a young man called Jörg who worked as a night watchman. I would wait at my window to see him on horseback. I didn’t know, then, that this was being attracted to someone.

The rules did not allow us to hold hands or kiss, and feelings could be communicated only via a minister. We knew we wanted to marry but when Jörg asked the ministers’ permission, he was refused. They said my spirit was bad. No one ever told me this and I was left to assume he no longer cared for me.

In 1961, I watched my family return to England on the back of a dusty lorry; they would later be moved back and forth between communes in the US and UK, but it had been decided by the brotherhood that, at 22, I was old enough to stay on my own. My heart was in my mouth as I tried to catch Mummy’s attention to wave goodbye. I saw them only a few more times, at the Bruderhof’s behest.

After my family left I was sent to Pennsylvania. I was alone and my spirit was crushed. Two years later, without explanation, I was excluded.

When you experience shock, your mind blanks things out and there are parts of that day I was left on the roadside that I cannot recall. I remember the little house where I rented a room, and the hospital where I asked for a job. And I know that the minute I was left alone, it was as if all my aches and pains left me. I was so relieved to start living. I made friends, but never married.

I heard Jörg’s name again 16 years later, living in London, through a couple who had also been excluded. They said he’d been forced to leave the commune and was living in America. I wrote to him at once.

When his reply arrived, it was as if I had shed a dead skin. I had longed so much for a husband and children, and now, at 40, all my seeking was over. We pieced together how the brotherhood had prevented us from marrying and what had happened to us since. He moved to England and we married six weeks later; soon after, we adopted three children.

I am 78 now and we live four miles from where I was born. I still have private spiritual belief but institutional Christianity isn’t for me.

I always loved my parents, and only when I trained as a counsellor did I feel anger towards them for their complicity in what happened. Part of me is brought to tears when I share my story, but the stronger feeling is one of fulfilment and victory at how life turned out.

• As told to Deborah Linton

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2016/dec/16/i-was-abandoned-by-my-cult-experience

Nov 4, 2016

IT HAPPENED TO ME: I Was Raised in a Fundamentalist Baptist Cult


Yahoo News

Samantha Clarke

xoJane November 2, 2016

 

Being raised in an oppressive religion made my childhood a living hell.

Our church building was a tattered, whitewashed old building from the late 19th century, with a great old-fashioned bell that barely worked and creaky haunted staircases that wound into odd back rooms and baptismal chambers. It was set in beautiful rural Oregon, only 45 minutes from Portland, but it felt like we could have been hundreds of miles away. We were surrounded by a handful of sleepy small towns and acre after acre of lush farmland.

It was a beautiful setting for a dark story.

My church could most accurately be classified as “fundamentalist Baptist,” although even that description seems too broad. To this day, I’ve never met another person, besides the 100 or so people I grew up with, who had the same interpretation of the Bible. This is part of why it’s always been so hard to explain, even to other people who were raised in extreme religious environments. But I know there are others out there who had experiences like mine, and that is why I share my story. 

Church was three days a week. On Sundays, there was a one-and-a-half-hour Sunday school service where we split up by age group, then a one-and-a-half to two-hour regular service, then lunch, then another hour and a half in the afternoon. Tuesday was "evening school," which was essentially a watered-down version of the church's seminary classes and meant for those who couldn't attend the seminary, like the women. Wednesday was youth group, which was much more social but still involved a sermon. Considering that by high school I was taking AP classes and maintaining a GPA above 4.0, my entire life felt like it was dedicated to study.

They believed that to be “saved,” one had to believe a very specific set of events happened: that Jesus Christ, the son of god, died on the cross for our sins, was buried, and rose again the third day. This is more or less what most Protestant groups believe is necessary for salvation, but my church took it one step further. It was almost like an incantation; one had to be able to literally recite the sentence above. My best friend in middle school, a Presbyterian, told me that she believed Jesus died on the cross for her sins and rose again the third day, and because she left out the “was buried” part, I was truly terrified that she was going to hell. This is just one example of how unbelievably literal they were with their doctrine.

They also believed in dispensations. In other words, they believed different parts of the Bible were written for people in different time periods — some past, some present, and some future — which, taken to that extreme, is a pretty unusual interpretation. They also believed that every temptation could be broken down to one of three sources: the devil, the world system (i.e., society), or your own human weakness. There were different step-by-step mental defenses against each one. 

I had untreated obsessive-compulsive disorder (they thought the Bible could heal mental illness and didn't take it seriously), and I would go through the steps over and over again, sometimes for days at a time, barely sleeping, thinking I was doing it wrong. In high school, I became severely depressed and found myself wishing I could just die and go to heaven so I wouldn't have to "fight the enemies" anymore. In retrospect, it was really scary, and I wish my family had known more about depression and mental illness and realized I needed help.

The way they interpreted the Bible was not the only display of their inner ugliness. They were also racist, sexist, and homophobic, to name just a few of their most blatantly hateful beliefs.

As far as people of color at the church, there was one black family with three boys, one Korean kid who'd been adopted by his Dwight Schrute–like German family, and then me — half Armenian, raised by my white mother and white stepfather. We five brown kids were immediately drawn to each other. But while the church community seemed fine with the black family in attendance, there was always this weird feeling like no one wanted us to mingle too much, and by the time I was 9 or 10, they vanished. It was only me and the Korean kid left. And we got to sit through some seriously racist sermons. 

I remember when we were about 11 hearing our old crotchety pastor say he was convinced the "troops from the East" in the Book of Revelation was referring to East Asians, and that they were the bad guys, and we should be afraid of them. And I also remember, around the same time, hearing that God's people, the Hebrews, were descended from Isaac, and the Arabs were descended from his half-brother Ishmael, painted as the “bad” son (both children of Abraham, Ishmael his illegitimate son — and being “illegitimate” myself, this also hit home). They of course took this to mean that the people of the Middle East are still the bad guys today, and Islam is their “heathen” religion. I can even remember the pastor saying "camel jockey" in front of a huge crowd, with me, this black-eyed little girl, staring straight up at him.

And that was just race. The sexism ran even more rampant. Not only were women not allowed to be pastors, they weren't even allowed to teach if men were in the room — only women and children. We were taught that women were "more easily deceived" (read: dumber) than men, as evidenced by how Eve was tricked by the serpent. Wives were supposed to submit to their husbands. Divorce was acceptable only in cases of proven adultery; not even abuse was good enough reason, and they kicked my mother out of the church for getting a divorce with "only" 20 years of abuse, and no adultery, as an excuse. Women were encouraged to wear skirts and dresses, to go into professions like teaching or nursing if they must work, to have lots of children, to be demure and submissive and innocent. I could go on and on.

Just as ugly, if perhaps less surprising, was my church's stance on homosexuality. It's a good thing no one found out I was bisexual — my first sexual experience was even with another girl, around age 12 — until years after I'd left, or I'd have been forced to do one-on-one counseling with the pastor and his wife at a minimum, or more likely been kicked out altogether. They had a habit of cutting people out without even trying to reach out to them.

Being raised in an oppressive religion, fighting imaginary enemies in my own mind with strange prescription-like steps, being constantly told my value as a woman was less than that of a man, having my race, my sexuality, my gender, and a lot of my personality ripped to pieces on a regular basis — it all made my childhood hell. It also made it really hard to do the whole figure-out-who-you-are thing most people do in college, because even though I left the church in my first semester, I had to start almost from scratch in putting the who-am-I pieces together. 

But here I am now. I no longer have nightmares about going to hell. I am a feminist with half-decent self-esteem. I am proud of my Middle Eastern heritage. I have accepted my sexual interest in both men and women. I no longer believe in a god, and I've even made it past the angry atheist phase and can understand why other people do believe in a god. I can even see a small handful of values I kept from the religion I was raised with, such as doing unto your neighbor as yourself, and trying not to judge people for their wrongs when you are not blameless yourself (glass houses and all that jazz).

I don’t believe religion itself was the problem. I believe people were the problem. I believe that, like any ideology, religion can be dangerous in the wrong hands. And I’m a stronger, more discerning person now for making it through that.

https://www.yahoo.com/style/happened-raised-fundamentalist-baptist-cult-190000321.html