Pursuing Counseling after Having Been in a Psychotherapy Cult

ICSA Annual Conference: Pursuing Counseling after Having Been in a Psychotherapy Cult

Rachel Bernstein, MSed, LMFT

Friday, June 24th

12:00 PM-12:50 PM

• Conference Information
• Agenda
• Conference Registration

So many people are justifiably panicked about pursuing counseling for themselves after having been at the mercy of the leader of a psychotherapy cult or a counselor in an abusive residential treatment center. I work with many people who were terrified about getting help again and waited for years to come for therapy or participate in my support group because their last counseling experience had been so traumatizing, abusive and manipulative.

People who were controlled and manipulated by therapists and coaches who crossed boundaries, took advantage of their power and that relationship, made them dependent on them and took them away from their families and friends, need to know that their new counselor can be trusted. People who have also endured being attacked in psychotherapy group settings and also have resultant guilt from having been pushed to attack other participants in the group are often too afraid to participate in groups that could actually offer them healthy support and community.

This presentation will provide counselors with ideas about how to address the specific needs of these clients who were abused within previous therapeutic settings and will also provide guidelines for people previously abused by a counselor who are now seeking treatment for themselves to help them assess if their new counselor will provide them with a healthy and safe therapeutic environment.

Speaker

Rachel Bernstein Former Member Support Group, Facilitator

Rachel Bernstein, MSed, LMFT, has been working with former cult members for nearly 30 years. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and Educator, who lives in Los Angeles, CA. She has been a member of ICSA for many years and has presented talks and moderated panels at ICSA conferences. Rachel previously ran the Maynard Bernstein Resource Center on cults, named after her father. She was the Clinician at the former Cult Clinic in Los Angeles, as well as the Cult Hotline and Clinic in Manhattan. She now treats former cult members and the families and friends of those in cults in her private practice. Rachel has facilitated numerous support groups for former cult members, for people who were in one-on-one cults, and for the families of those in cults. Rachel has published many articles, made media appearances, consulted on shows and movies about cults, and has been interviewed for podcasts and YouTube videos. Rachel is the host of her weekly Podcast, "IndoctriNation," about breaking free from systems of control. RachelBernsteinTherapy.com, bernsteinlmft@gmail.com 818-907-0036

Rachel is speaking at:

Pursuing Counseling after Having Been in a Psychotherapy Cult

June 24, 2022

12:00 pm-12:50 pm

Panel Part 1: The Evolution of Cult Intervention

June 25, 2022

11:00 am-11:50 am

Panel Part 2: The Evolution of Cult Intervention

June 25, 2022

12:00 pm-12:50 pm

Conspiracy Theories- Why They Have Recently Grown and What They Teach Us About Our Need for Answers

June 25, 2022

4:00 pm-4:50 pm

Building Bridges; Leaving and Recovering from Cultic Groups and Relationships: A Workshop for Families

June 26, 2022

2:00 pm-4:00 pm

https://whova.com/web/icsaa_202207/

Why I’m Not Ashamed To Say I Go To Therapy

Haley Goldberg
Self
March 11, 2016

I used to tell my friends I had a "dentist appointment"—now, I know I don't have to lie.

My sophomore year of high school, I had a lot of “appointments.” I’d rotate on what I told my friends they were for: dentist, doctor, orthodontist. Really, I was going to weekly therapy sessions, and I was afraid to tell them the truth.

It wasn’t my first time in therapy. I started seeing a therapist in second grade, when my fear of thunderstorms had me obsessively watching the Weather Channel and the sky, afraid to go to school if there was a single dark cloud, a 50-percent chance of rain, or, god forbid, a tornado watch. If a thunderstorm rolled in during the school day, the teacher would excuse me to go visit the school therapist, where I’d anxiously sit and talk with her until the sound of rain passed. No one in my classes knew where I went except for the teacher, and I made sure to keep it that way.

Around fourth grade, I started seeing a therapist on the weekends. Most sessions, I went angrily, ashamed of myself for needing the help. I refused to open up to the therapist at all. Middle school came, and, somehow, each year I started caring less and less about watching the sky. I stopped seeing a therapist regularly, and thought I’d finished my stint with mental issues—I was fixed now.

But then, sophomore year of high school, my anxiety came back for an extended visit. I realized that fear of weather was just a small manifestation of obsessive compulsive disorder and general anxiety, and the two began to torment me each day. My mom suggested I head back to therapy. Unlike when I was younger, I didn’t resist it this time. I went into the sessions and began opening up, recognizing the way I think and learning how I could fight back against irrational thoughts and fears, things that could easily suck me up into an anxious spiral. It was difficult work confronting the things that scared me and the power my mind could have over my emotions, but it needed to be done. I could tell it was helping.

Still, I didn’t want to tell anyone. I didn’t want my friends—who I’d leave on a perfectly sunny summer day at the pool for a “dental cleaning”—to think there was something wrong with me. At school I was happy, confident and carefree. I didn’t want people to know the truth, to look at me like I was “sick” or not OK. 

Looking back, I realize now that’s why I should have told people. To show them that, yes, someone with a mental illness can seem totally fine on the outside, but battle something on the inside. To show them that it’s OK to get help for mental issues—just like it’s OK to go to the doctor for the flu, or the dentist for a cavity. To show them that they’re not alone if they too struggle with their thoughts and feelings.

Today, I know I’m not alone. A staggering one in five adults suffer from a mental illness in the U.S. in a given year, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness. And 18.1 percent of adults—that’s 44 million people—in the U.S. suffer specifically from anxiety disorders, according to Mental Health America. But sadly, there’s still a stigmasurrounding getting help for mental illnesses. Only about a third of people suffering from depression seek help from a mental health professional, and the MHA explains it’s because they “believe depression isn’t serious, that they can treat it themselves or that it is a personal weakness rather than a serious medical illness.”

What I’ve learned from my experience: Your mental health should be treated like your physical health—addressed with the help of a professional and treated not as something you caused, but something you need to care for. You wouldn’t blame yourself for catching the flu. Don’t blame yourself for depression, anxiety or any mental illness. And, don’t be ashamed to seek help and speak out about it. 

Since high school, I’ve been in and out of therapy a few times. It’s no longer something I’m looking to “fix” me, but to aid me when I just can’t seem to keep my anxiety and OCD under control. I look at it like scheduling a spinning class: It keeps me healthy. I’m now open with my friends when I’m heading to an appointment, and I’ve even suggested therapy to those I’ve seen struggling with their own mental health. Sometimes, chatting over coffee with a friend isn’t enough to fix what’s going on—and that’s OK. I wouldn’t be living the life I am today without taking control of my mental health with the help of a professional.

Recently, Kerry Washington opened up about her own experience with therapy in a video where she gave advice to her 18-year-old self. The star still sees a therapist, and I found her words echoing what I’d want to tell that girl going to “dentist appointments” her sophomore year of high school.

“Just know that everybody has growing pains, and the only way out is through,” she said. “You’re going to find therapy, and it’s going to be amazing.”

I couldn’t agree more. 

If you’re struggling with anxiety or any mental illness, resources are available at the National Alliance on Mental Illness.

http://www.self.com/trending/2016/03/why-im-not-ashamed-to-say-i-go-to-therapy/

Former Cult-Member Support Group - Encino, CA

In December, 2012, I will be starting my next Former Cult-Member Support Group. This group is for those who have been in a cult, or cult-like group. Family and friends of those in cults are welcome, as well.

I am a therapist who has worked for over 20 years with people affected by cults. I have helped those who have left a wide variety of cultic situations. This support group is intended to:

• Help you develop a greater understanding of manipulation, control, influence, and fear-inducement,
• Help you address, in a safe environment, the confusion, hurt, loss, sadness, anger, or worry you may be feeling because of your experiences,
• Help you connect with others who understand.

The Details:

• The group will be 90 minutes long, and the cost for each group is just $40.
• It will meet every other Saturday. The first group will be held at noon. We will determine as a group if that is a good time for a majority of the group attendees.

Feel free to pass my phone/email along to others who you feel would benefit from this resource, and I'll be happy to speak with them about it. Take care ~ 

• The first group is scheduled for Saturday, December 1st, at 12 noon.
• It will meet in my office (6255 Ventura Blvd, Suite 806, Encino, CA 91436)
• Please let me know if you will be attending.

Rachel Bernstein, LMFT, MSEd

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

16255 Ventura Blvd, Suite 806

Encino, CA 91436

818.907.0036

rbpsychology@gmail.com